Venue: Gourmet Burger Kitchen, London
Character: Porkie, Claudine, Chris, Cheesie
Prop: Oversized burger, oversized burger, oversized burger and oversized burger
I’m writing this article about what not to order on the first dinner date. And i think i should put GBK burger in the list.
I don’t understand why oversized burgers exist in the first place. It makes whoever is eating it look like a chowhound. *insert cannibal guffaws*
Maybe that’s because i stay in Malaysia. The Londoners like Porkie Claudine Chris have no problem wolfing down the humongous monstrosity.
Why oh why. It sure looks delicious i know i know. The melting cheese is oozing out i know i know. You’re hungry i know i know.
But how am i going to stuff something that is five times the diameter of my ingestion orifice in?
It’s impossible to eat a GBK without any of the following embarrassment: leaking, spilling, dripping, splattering, dropping or have ketchup and mustard stretched all across your cheeks.
So totally not sexy. I wonder how Paris Hilton did it. Seriously.
But some of my friends are apparently quite professional at burger eating.
This is Porkie the burger expert’s burger
Neatly cut into quarters.
This is Claudine’s burger.
She squeezed it so perfectly, bit into it so gracefully without any grease squirting onto her face.
This is Chris the Shawarma master.
He’s fantasizing himself transforming into a killim, sawing strips of meat off a gigantic beef skewer with the aid of cutlery. It worked fine, albeit eccentric.
Last but not cheese.
Eating an oversized burger. Cheesie style. Yes i’d like another new napkin please, thank you very much.
December 11th, 2007 at 12:55 pm
me first !
December 11th, 2007 at 12:56 pm
nice nice burgers!
December 11th, 2007 at 12:56 pm
Omg u adowable misha pie always first, no need study ah!
December 11th, 2007 at 1:29 pm
hah. that’s what i would have done.
*quietly laughs at myself*
December 11th, 2007 at 1:43 pm
Just like chewing on that piece of sushi’s seaweed on your date :d
December 11th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
The potato wedges caught my attention more ~
December 11th, 2007 at 2:05 pm
hahaha … today is no school day for me ..
December 11th, 2007 at 2:56 pm
argh….i miss GKB so much !!
December 11th, 2007 at 3:14 pm
oversized? wait till you have the American burgers.. haha now that’s wht I call OVERSIZED!
December 11th, 2007 at 5:03 pm
They make our burger look so puny… ^^
December 11th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
yummy~~~
December 11th, 2007 at 7:33 pm
lol..me wonder how they eat burgers too..coz after d meal,my hold hand would b filled if sauce..i had 2 keep wiping my mouth coz d sauce was not onli on my lips but perhaps nose n face..oh gosh,not 2 mention pimples might pop up…my frens say tht i’m like having war wif d food
koko,claudine n chris geng la….can still manage 2 keep their grace n table manners
December 11th, 2007 at 8:03 pm
iI have super-duper appetite now, you know you know?
December 11th, 2007 at 8:13 pm
i wonder if they have a kid’s meal. perhaps you should try ordering one to get the not-so-oversize burger then the burger wouldn’t die in such a horrid death. XD
December 11th, 2007 at 10:35 pm
erm……isn’t it Gourmet Burger Kitchen?
how come it became “Venue: Gourmet Kitchen Burger, London..?”
December 11th, 2007 at 11:03 pm
wow… cant see this BIG burger in my town ….
December 11th, 2007 at 11:21 pm
omg…those are bloody burgers…
December 12th, 2007 at 12:10 am
Did you manage to finish the burger?
December 12th, 2007 at 12:40 am
Nice mah?The french fries?Or McD’s better?
December 12th, 2007 at 2:38 am
Sometimes food just has to be messy (so you know you’re enjoying it) especially when cheese is involved!
December 12th, 2007 at 3:56 am
That reminded me about TGIF’s humungous burgers! Just 2 nights ago I had the JD Burger and I remembered how my friend teased me for being a messy fellow eating a burger with a fork and a knife. Seriously, I am in the same position as you are. I tried holding, squeezing, cutting. Neither worked out. Or perhaps we Malaysians do not cut it to eat large-sized burgers? Hmmmm.
December 12th, 2007 at 6:45 am
Kyky - ehehe.. of course mah.. must have good table manners
no one use knife like wanna kill someone though 
cheesie dear - speaking of GBK, just had it today..ehehe.. Cajun Burger with Chips (garlic mayo n smoke chilli mayo) and lime milkshake…totally cheesillicious! (minus the cheese cuz was no cheese :P)
Bin Bin - when you come..i take you to this place
December 12th, 2007 at 8:45 am
i reckon when they were creating the burgers….they had me in mind!
December 12th, 2007 at 10:24 am
Yay,Porkie is THE BEST!!!
December 12th, 2007 at 10:25 am
Grace: omg what a terrible mistake. I changed it!
bigsmallkid: eat 3 ramli! its the same!
babyQ: no not bloody at all. They are well done.
ahlost: nooo
Ying Bin: It was awesome. I got eternally sick of Mc D. Don’t even remind me of that.
Banzai: lol! I can’t disagree!
jyushiang: i prefer small ones like Mos Burger. So that i can eat two different ones! WAHAHA.
Porkie: NOTHING! can be better than Mos Burger.
sheon: so are you like… gigantic?
December 12th, 2007 at 11:35 am
hehe. The biggest burgers I’ve had were from Chilli’s. I take everything apart and slowly eat piece by piece. haha. and I can never finish one whole burger. Half also can pengsan dy.
December 12th, 2007 at 12:27 pm
omg…messy cheesie eating messy cheesy burger…
December 12th, 2007 at 12:28 pm
cheesie: yeah…in ‘that’ category lar…..182cm weighing 220pounds…..
December 12th, 2007 at 2:44 pm
hey hey..
the burger looks really yummy in porkie’s hand…
erm..but yours….:p
December 12th, 2007 at 3:21 pm
lol i always eat it with fork and knife too. When I was in Japan, I even saw some cute jap chicks eating MOS burger with fork and knife =p
December 12th, 2007 at 9:46 pm
Yum MEAT! *drools*
December 12th, 2007 at 9:47 pm
who was your first day?
December 12th, 2007 at 10:51 pm
OMG. I want MOS burgerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!
Arghhhhh. I want teriyaki chicken japanese rice burger ect ect ect with fries and lots lots lots of chilli sauceeeee!
Don’t bother about me, I am just hungry.
December 12th, 2007 at 10:54 pm
mos burger rocks! it’s helluva lot better than any other burgers!
December 13th, 2007 at 4:28 am
=D
definitely not a good idea to have that on a first date. the guy will run away as fast as he can. haha.
December 13th, 2007 at 5:47 pm
whoa..thats super huge..if i eat it,i will embarassed myself for sure.lol..
cheeser,get well soon..
December 14th, 2007 at 12:55 am
screw the burger. LOOK AT DEM CHIPS.
December 14th, 2007 at 4:02 am
It’s the CHIPS that were amazing! Don’t get me started with the dips… Garlic Mayo Dip, Thai Chilli Dip, Blue Cheese Dip, Tomato Chilli Dip, and more….
*droooooools*
December 16th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
very classic ur illustration haha, I like!
December 17th, 2007 at 7:46 pm
Wow… It is really big le.
December 18th, 2007 at 5:21 am
eh ringo, the nicely cut up one is mine leh. LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
February 14th, 2008 at 4:30 am
Would you get slapped if you told a cute girl she had a “nice burger”?
And who eats a burger with no CHEESE!!!