Car, Petrol and House

June 21, 2008 in Eccentric Ringoism

No matter what I blog I end up offending someone. So let’s talk about something boring and mundane today. Like, I had KFC for lunch today. It’s oily and unhealthy. Ok scrap that. KFC will feel offended.

Talk about petrol hike can gua. Everyone is already offended by it. Plus, petrol is not sentient. It won’t get offended. So I guess it’s relatively safe.

I cancelled my car order. God I just again offended someone. Now there’s one angry car dealer more on this planet.

For several reasons actually, that I cancelled the order.

1. Petrol is expensive. I can’t possibly get over my kiamsiapness to pay for such exorbitantly priced liquid, unless I stay home all the time, which defeats the purpose of buying a car.

2. Just found out that my parking lot in my new house is located on the 6th floor. Damn waste petrol, fucckaccino.

3. I really really reeeeeeally think I should wait. I don’t really like how it looks. Except for its petrol consumption. Or rather the lack of it.

4. Plus, I wanna wait for the car plate number WTF 666. Wicked!!!

5. After all the hassle, I found out that I can’t afford a car.

God. Bali is an evil place.

Bumped into Mike my very friendly and professional but now angry car dealer few months ago, when I was fresh out of MDG.

Mike: Hey, I actually watch your show.
Me: No way! I was crap.
Mike: I even voted for you!
Me: No you didn’t.
Mike: I did, seriously.
Me: No you didn’t, you know why?
Mike: Why?
Me: Because you don’t want me to win the show.
Mike: Why?
Me: Because if I win the show you’ll lose one car order! HAHAHA.

I’m sorry Mike.

Went out with Danny the other night, we couldn’t settle for a place to drink. Drove around in circles in his car.

Danny: It’s okay, we can just drive around and makan angin.
Me: I don’t mind. It’s your petrol.
Danny: -_- *zhar dou*
Me: Seriously, I’m not quite sure if that’s such a good idea for dates nowadays. You might end up spending more than two Sex On The Beach.

Or Beaches?

We settled for coffee and juice in the end in a crap bar.

Now let’s talk about my new place. It’s gorgeous, and I can’t wait to move in. Yes I’m going to have a house warming party soon. It’s open to everyone! But address only disclosed to those who bring one of the following items as my house warming gift. Or two. Or three. Or more. I don’t really mind you see.

God I have so many things I need in the house! Let’s see.

1. A nice, comfy 3-seater L shape sofa. No it doesn’t have to be from Lorenzo.
2. A plasma. Woot.
3. Sound system!
4. TV console.
5. DVD player.
6. A fridge. Good if you can open the door, put an elephant in, close the door, open the door again, take out the elephant and put a giraffe in.
7. A FREAKING HUGE WARDROBE! (Which size can only be emphasized by typing in caps and size 4 font) Good if you can slide open the door and put eight Kennysias in. Then I can sell him on Cheesie’s Wardrobe also.
8. A nice Victorian clock. Wait. Forget about it. You can’t give a clock to someone.
9. A Victorian screen for that stupid cubicle.
10. A wifi router.
11. Pink/Cream color Roman blinds. God. Curtains are sooooooooo expensive! I’ll email you the exact measurements.
12. White Venetian blind is the next option. These Italians really good at windows aren’t they.
13. A microwave. So the next time I get angry with Ching I can bake a pizza for lunch. Yum.
14. English tea sets. Omg aren’t they lovely.
15. Fluffy carpets for living hall, my bedroom and dining area.
16. Ok la dining table set too. I very greedy meh?
17. A small fluffy carpet for Cheddie.
18. Three freaking gigantic, magnificent wall mirrors. Yes yes, narcissism. And also for fengshui purpose.
19. Oh ya a white dressing table. Victorian style.
20. Bathroom mirror.
21. Bathtub + flavored bath salt. Yum.
22. Giraffes from Bali!!! Wait I already have two.
23. A new laptop. Pink, please. (No, black doesn’t go with my room color, that’s why.)
24. A comfy day bed. (Wait, don’t think my living room is that big).
25. Foot massager!!! Very important! I love foot massage!
26. A door bell that woofs. So that Cheddie will go answer the door.
27. A very beautiful bedside lamp. Victorian style. Get one from Lovely Lace. Neh, I want the mauve-colored one. :D
28. Toilet brush. Never mind. I can buy that myself.
29. Expensive paintings! (Clue: Cottage)
30. A pony. (Can I keep a pony in an apartment?)
31. La Mer face cream. (Eh, getting irrelevant meh?)
32. Ok ok. Hmmm. A vacuum cleaner la. uSuck.
33. Kitchen stove. The electric, canggih kind.
34. Door grille. I hate it but they say have to put wor.
35. A lot of canned food! Because my house would be so gorgeous I don’t even feel like going out anymore.
36. Last but not cheese (really, I don’t need cheese), a Butler. I don’t mind if his first name is Gerald. Hehe. He cooks and cleans and fulfills my every need and if I feel like being subordinate I can just slip on my French maid dress and j is very handsome.
37. I think that’s all. Will edit this list if I think of anything else.
38. Ok worst of all if tight on budget just get me anything from Lovely Lace, their laces are lovely indeed.

Please let me know which item you are bringing. I don’t need 14 doorbells that woof.

Thank you.

P/S: By the way it is not a joke. In case you think it is, because a lot of people cannot tell when I’m joking and when I’m not.

No la. I’m just joking. Hahahaha. See, hard to differentiate leh.

Ok. I’m serious. It’s not a joke.

75 people cheesed “Car, Petrol and House”

  1. - LesLeY - says:

    congratz!

  2. errr…so u ARE joking rite =x?

  3. new place?where?

    haha..wat a stupid ques..

  4. haha…………funny u.

  5. ehhh so are you joking or not haha if you are not means i cannot go nyehe then again if you don’t invite me also i cannot go HAHA

  6. Just like everyone else, I am wondering whether you are joking or not. But don’t worry, you are not pissing me off. Hahaha…

  7. “28. Toilet brush. Never mind. I can buy that myself.”

    Dang, I’ll do you one better. I’ll get you a plunger :D

  8. *sweatING* I am thinking of bringing butler…. but u say u r joking…suan le ba….

  9. congrats… cheesie… :P

  10. A dollar saved is a dollar earned. No need car cause you can always call your “chauffeur” to bring you kai kai mah. Heh

  11. hahaha !! luckily am in sg so i wont have to brainstorm what to bring if i wna go !

    congrats on the new house :) hope this one would be comfy !

  12. Someone mentioned my name here…???

  13. I’ll get you the toilet brush.. hehehehe..

  14. You see, for all this English stuff..you need a trip to England again ;)
    Lets..I bring foot massager, butler, canned food and a pig? (can get pony but pig shud be ok as a 2nd pet :P)

    btw..someone still witholding my absinthe and vodka black -_-

  15. hmmm ringo you’re very self service (layan sendiri) today :P

  16. See, if you cooked me, it’d be more oily and unhealthy than KFC – and I might just taste better than the freaking char siew. Grease oozing and all that.

  17. When people start complaining your offending them, then perhaps it time to cut them loose. Do you really need these sort of people in your life? Anyway, whose life do you wish to live? theirs or your own? No-one ever said becoming successful is easy, there will alway be those who are jealous or try to put you down for some reason… especially when you start succeeding… and they don’t.

  18. haha.. half serious half joking gua…

  19. wahaha! funny!! MUST DISCLOSE ADDRESS LOH!! oops then maybe you will get like, fan mail everyday. MAYBE YOU WILL EVEN GET A FLEA CIRCUS FROM A CRAZY MEXICAN FAN! :D (sorry hor random. read from book one :D)
    LOL i think a lot of… GUYS are willing to be your butler, free of charge. ;D

  20. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
    i love ur blog!

  21. -.-, confused, to joke or not to joke?

  22. Hey babe, congratulations for finding a new place that is gorgeous too. I would happily provide you English teaset if I were in Malaysia. ;)

  23. I know! u’re jokin! =D

  24. ha? what are you talking about????????????

    How much is gas nowaday overthere? it’s hitting 5 per gallon here in the US…. think im going bike! :’(

  25. So, where should I put the new Mercedes E-Class … on the 6th floor? I don’t think this gift will quite fit through your front door. But you’re always welcome to try.

  26. *tries to figure out the ending* *dies in process*

  27. hey cheesie met ya today at the nuffnang party and you tole me to drop a comment…so here i am…
    just to let ya know…u look better in real life…AND u already look GREAT in pictures…

    drop me a comment too yea…

    http://arifsblackbook.blogspot.com

  28. A clock is not a gift to give in chinese culture, but for housewarming it’s a great gift!

  29. I’m offended that people can be so easily offended.

  30. i heard that the owner of TNB is having a car no. TN8, and MAX15 belongs to the boss of maxis…why do you want WTF666…lolol…

  31. yeah you should have RIN 60 ;)

  32. lol. i love kfc :P

  33. blog abt nuffnang live party :) i know u went as a bunnY!! cute!

  34. Congratz for the new home~!!

    Saw u couple of weeks ago, so have u become the member for the fitness club? ^_

  35. That is funny and I like KFC.

  36. I’ve got a Sony DVD player, got it for free from a competition, its yet to be opened.. Can I come?

  37. I’ll work on the pony thingy. :D

  38. i’ll bring cheddie a little kitten (___/) can i come?
    …………………………………….(= . = )……………..

  39. There’s always NGV…but driving around with a gas tank…hmm don’t think is a good idea… ppl at the road side might just flag u down as a taxi.

    Nowadays when i drive, i no longer look at the road…i keep staring at the petrol indicator…haha to ensure it doesn’t fall suddenly! :P

  40. Oh yea… 1 toilet brush on the way…haha

  41. come…i’ll contribute one thing………..eh..how bout the bath salt?? hahahaha

  42. bluepanda says:

    eh…so u joking or not now? :S

    I’ll try to get you a pony ———> My Little Pony toy……can ah? :p

  43. LOL!
    funny one.
    can i go to ur house warming party?!
    i can buy u something from lovely lace or a fluffy mat for cheddie! =D

    i missed ur bday party so i really dun wanna miss this one! >_

  44. Recently, i watched Pride and Prejudice (BBC version) and got the idea to revamp my bedroom into English style. I bought the tea set, bedside lamp and other miscellaneous stuff at KK Home Deco, Nilai 3. Btw, i have a membership card so i got 20% discount for some of the stuff, woot! Cheaper that Lovely Lace considering my tight budget. T_T

    I cancelled my car order too. So now i’m still using my old Kembara. But i think i’m okay with it.

  45. Hmm.. funny how you dont need a washing machine + dryer for a new apartment. Those would be a top priority for me though =P

  46. Reyen: Hair dryer is more important! Haha.

  47. Lesley: thank you! You still stay in Subang?
    carlame: I haven’t decided if i am. lolol.
    angel: wahahhaha. 1-38 your pick.
    a shen: how are you!
    angeliCassie: i met our group member david! should meet you too!
    ruehyinn/blueepinkk: i’ll soon decide!
    hawk: ok la beggar can’t be chooser!
    clement: how would you know im not?

  48. atrica: thankers!
    Vanquish: then i need like 10 on rotation at least.
    devina: *stomps feet*
    gerald: yes yes. last name butler?
    ahlost: i.will.buy.it.myself. hahahaha
    porkie: pig can. Cheddie’s pet.
    pei jiun: what! where got!
    ching: yum. best nya.

  49. jeff: malaysians are whiny little creatures. look who’s talking. hahahaha
    gp: ya you know me best
    blu: i dont mind! hahahhaha.
    cherry: i love cherry too!!!
    vivien: i’m indecisive!
    ponikuta: :( :( :( don’t care. Please courier it with FRAGILE tag thank you.
    jojo: how you knowwwww!
    annie: very ex la going to be exer comes july.
    loong: while you’re at it may i change the E for a 5? :D
    may zhee: don’t die yet! i havent finish entertaining the sweetheart you sent me from hell.

  50. arif: thank you nice to meet you too!
    me: no waaaaaaay
    B.H.: god i’m so offended by your comment hahahaha
    nah: why not!!! wtf666
    kian: KFC breakfast have you tried?
    abby: no i didn’t! :D
    angus: what! when! i never work out! wrong person?!
    david chew: watch cholesterol level!
    wesley: yes please!!!
    KY: don’t be so notti. later i go tell her.
    mei: but that’s not on the list!
    kenny: i know right!!!! how much u pump right now?

  51. sheon: sorry but it has to come together with the other item.
    bluepanda: cannot! please try again
    vea: :D yes yes
    jo: omg really! but that’s so far away! is it any good? if it is i might wanna go and lookie lookie

  52. I’ll bring the La Mer facecream! q:

  53. I’m a good boy, why say I notti!!!! =/

  54. wahhhhh,so many things u want…..@_________@ if i buy will broke too.
    hehe,i know u as spoil as me…
    you are going to move out with your mom?

  55. Ok. I’ll bring over 2 cans of sardine.

  56. heeh! wahh a lot of toilet brush offers.
    i bring pink laptop for you want :D what brand and what shade of pink xD

  57. last 2 weeks i think.. u were there, with another girl friend..
    think u just went there for weighting and some1 was consulting u… the 1 in mid-v~
    anything u need help on ur new home, can let me kn also ^_^

  58. WTF!!!!! i am so confuse now lah. So you are joking or what? erggggggggggggggggg, make me dam frus reading your blog at 2.43am. =(

  59. i can be a butler and i’ll bring 2 cans of mushroom!

  60. cooL! congratulations on ur new house! hope u get all those things..i’m hoping to find sponsor for myself as well ;P

  61. hmm.. let’s see what I can help with the new house okay.. :)
    maybe something for cheddie?

  62. aiyoh, yr listing is the same as mine (moving new hse too) ……. how ar?

  63. cheesie, I wished I can go, but too far la.. (yay yay can save money) *show disappointed face*

    XD Enjoy your new house.

  64. blur… @_@

    instead of english teaset get u chinese tea set can ah… :lol:

  65. Ok lah .. i’ll sponsor you a toilet brush…

  66. hmm.. you sound a bit greedy..

  67. Turn it into a blogger’s party again, themed “Old English County”…have your Bosh sponsor you the big LCD display with ads going on for the whole of the party…make all those wishlist as tribute, well most of the deco stuff is needed anyway, consult Bosh again XD

    1) you can warm your house
    2) you get all the items
    3) your neighbours will kill u after

    lol…happy house warming..

  68. Nowadays, people go for wrought iron grill. No more the ugly looking metal iron.

  69. hi…U need a water filter! I can send the details for you to compare if you need it :-D

  70. I shall come warm your house! Serious!

  71. peijiun: ARE YOU SERIOUSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
    Ky: *twist arm* HAHAHHA
    Evelyn: She’s in seremban!
    simon: then you will get half my address
    blu: ARE YOU SERIOUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
    Angus: i think wrong person darling
    ch@rlie: wahhahaha. brain exercise.

  72. Serge Norguard: are the mushrooms magical?
    huei: yay! same to you
    tom: hehehehhe
    johnny ong: then you can buy something for me first and get some idea from there whahahahha
    Pingping: lol. thank you dearie
    asstha: waaaa long time no see you here! CANNOT must be english hehe
    michael: you all so kiam T_T
    jolene: bo bian. human nature.
    blurcase: wei ya good idea wei then i can wear my little cottage dress. sounds good hmmm
    hijackqueen: now got invisible grill leh. canggih
    hihi: eh how come i didnt think of that. very true.
    albert: with what??!?! camel fur for peacock feather?

  73. It’s a secret and a surprise. Two in one!!!

  74. yes dear.

    mushrooms are magical. There’s a red one for you to become BIG (at where…dont ask)

  75. i have been goin for window shopping whenever i can, jotting down what i have seen wherever i went to in order to remember what is where …….. moving from a condo to a 3 storey hse.

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