A stinky dairy waste, a wacky bird and two veggies with their atas cameras in London are going through excruciating tests in mission to obtain the Certicicate of Camslutting.
Test One: Public Camslutting
Able to camslut at public places shamelessly. The more public the better.
Example: Outside Harrods.
Pose like no tomorrow.
Oblivious to the surrounding.
Test Two: Action
Speak louder than words of course. Do whatever it takes to slut for attention.
Cheesie: *uses Penguage, ie Penguin Language* You’re so hot can die dot com.
Jas: Baby, we’re in London. It should read, “you’re so hot can die dot com dot uk”. MUAHAHAHHA.
Jas: Please eat less. You’re as heavy as an obese elephant.
Jas: Just pulling your leg! WAHAHHAHAHA.
Change of location. The entire camslut troop marched to the Royal whatever Albert place. (Peacock, were you born here?)
But camslutting continues.
Test Three: Get into the picture, literally
Campimp Porkie taking picture of cammamasan Claudine taking picture of camslut Jas kacaoing my pose.
The more irritating you are, the better a camslut you can become.
Test Four: Steady Body
Able to hold and freeze for at least 5 second.
Test Five: QC
Brilliant camsluts must know quality control. Pose, check, delete, pose again. Repeat steps ad nauseam.
Test Six: Bend it like Ahem
Must possess super flexible body.
Jas’s bird kick.
Which campimp Porkie failed to copy.
And that’s as far as a cheese can bend.
Test Seven: Puppets and Mannequins
Pose like one. The more statue-like the more professional.
Test Eight: Camslut Everything
A statue. A flower petal. A rock. A phone.
Even a lamp post wouldn’t potong our steam (lame pun?).
Test Nine: If Being Cool Fails, Try Cute.
Test Ten: If all else fail, try retard factor.
If you pass all the tests above, congratulations. You’re now officially a camslut. Kindly donate 10 pounds to “Send Cheesie to London” fund raising campaign to receive a self-destructive certificate. Thank you.
P/S: Cheesie’s Japanese Schoogirl Rebel outfit is for sale. Check out her Wardrobe.