I discovered that after having just been on a totally amazing and exclusive heli ride around KL city, picked the boyfriend up from KLIA, shook hands with Jackie Chan and Daniel Wu, and am going on a fully sponsored trip by Air Asia (thank you) to attend V Fest in Perth on Friday, my life still feels like a piece of crap.

This whole “wow Cheesie your life is great” thing is just… 

I wonder how many great and famous and popular and rich people in this world think “so what” to themselves everyday. Oh, my film just won 8 Oscars–so what? Oh i just bought a private jet—so what? Ohai my name is God—so what?

Really. So what?

I know writing this makes a lot of people who sayang me sad. But i’m kinda tired of writing about wow this is wonderful oh that’s great yay omfg fantabulous and hooray i think i have just seen an angel, cheers.

Need a break from pseudo happy.

Lately i have been breeding a twisted, secret, dark, perverted wish in my head. God. I am amazed by the perversity of human nature. I was fantasizing about spending an absolutely atrocious birthday. The operative word here being fantasizing. You know, misery, lotsa bad luck, loneliness, arguments and shit. Cry a bucket, and call it a day.

I felt a little shocked by my capability of bringing the masocheesm to a whole new level. Such shock then slowly diminished and was replaced by sheer self admiration of my capability of bringing the masocheesm to a whole new level (wow, bravo!). And then i felt secretly pleased with my own perverted thoughts.

.

.

.

HAHAHA NO LA IT IS A JOKE, GUESS WHAT? APRIL FOOL, GOTCHA, SUCKER! My life is perfect like an A class Hermes Birkin imitation Teehee XOXO!

Right.

Or at least that’s what i wish i could say, at the end of this entry.

Honest.

Believe me, you don’t need to be envious of my life. Really one.

(But then again don’t listen to whatever i say, i’m highly impressed by my own inconsistency. And it’s April fool anyway. I can say anything and nobody has to believe me.)