I woke up 4am’ish and I just wanted to write (type) something. Although I was told to sleep waaay longer than this. I’m sorry. =(
Seems like my biological clock is cheesed-up and when i try to sleep more, i actually wake up ealier and earlier instead. Cheez that should happen 40 years later man. Ditto to the hair loss.
I was thinking about the way I’ve been spending my holidays. Actually I’m quite happy with it and I think this is the most productive least unproductive holiday so far. I did nothing much but I am feeling less empty deep inside.
I’ve had some little holiday out of the holidays for myself, and it’s great. But happy time does fly and I think it’s time for me to return to my cage.
It feels great to be away from the college (I still don’t think I wanna call it a uni) and I feel so much more relaxed. Hopefully I drop less hair now. Haha.
I’ve been thinking a lot after talking to Sky and Jac few weeks ago. I’ve been thinking what those A1s in my SPM are for. Sure they got me a full scholarship in a fancy college of my desire. But it turned out the scholarship is not so full after all and the college is much less fancy than I expected. In fact, little did I realize the price to pay for studying in such a seemingly glamorous uni college is way too high for me.
But I didn’t regret a single bit, because I don’t think I will be happier if I study something else or elsewhere. Just I wonder sometimes, I’ve been dreaming too much rather than thinking. I don’t think I even think at all. I dream too much and assume too much, that’s prolly the problem with me. Maybe that’s also why I got heartbroken umpteen times. I’m not exceptionally smart to think to save the heartbreaks.
It’s okay. I’ve got a way to fool with heartbreaks now. And I’ve learnt it a hard way. But at least I learnt something.
And what the cheese, I’m going for a real holiday again! Taiwan Taiwan! =)))
Ahhh, time to get more sleep. I’ll try.