Today i was eating a bowl of pork noodles and i found a strand of hair beneath the meatballs, passing itself off as beehoon of a different race!

What a disgrace to the delicious hawker delicacy!

Imagine there’s a hair in this bowl of hakka mee.


So i picked it out with my chopstick and placed it underneath a piece of tissue, pretending, “i didn’t see it, i didn’t see it” and carried on eating. But i didn’t finish it, because it’s somewhat disgusting and potong‘ed the yummy steam.

Luckily it was a strand of straight, fine hair, if it was all curly and frizzy… OMG, one of my friend had this traumatizing experience that she discovered several curly coarse hair in her nasi lemak!!!666 Where else can the hair belong to but you-know-where!

Her stomach churned upside down and she hadn’t had dinner that day.


Which reminds me of a joke.

Q: What’s worse than discovering a worm in the apple you’re eating?
A: Discovering half a worm.

Haha! I love sick jokes!

Imagine there’s a hair in this fresh bowl of garden salad.


Anyway! That’s not what i wanted to say. What i wanted to say was, SINCE WHEN WAS HAVING AN ANONYMOUS STRAND OF HAIR IN YOUR FOOD ACCEPTABLE?

I notice a lot of people i know do just that, eating a plate/bowl of hair-contaminated (think dandruff! kutu! 0_o) food as though nothing happened.

They say, 眼不见为净 (it’s clean if you can’t see it). I dunno! I find it somewhat true. I worked in a dimsum restaurant before (yes yes the push-cart girl) and GUESS WHAT! Back in the kitchen (which smelled like crap), there were flies all around frozen dimsums! When they dropped chopsticks onto the floor, the just picked it up and put it back on the table (before the opening hour, so no one saw it).

AND THE LAST STRAW. They did the same to dimsums. The dimsums were frozen, so they’re still edible and after steaming, they just look hot fresh oh-so-delicious.

And you think a hair in your food is disgusting!

The worst food related nightmare in my life. And i haven’t eaten a single piece of siumai for 3 years. But now it’s okay because dimsum is too good to pass on. Plus, i can’t see anything from the kitchen so i assume they are A-class clean. Like they say, 眼不见为净.

Imagine there’s a hair in this rice bento.

But after what happened today, i think it’s so wrong!

Is that supposed to be the way? I mean, somehow to me it seems like i will be making an enormous fuss if i complain about it. But, since when did we have to compromise on food hygiene when it’s every bit our right to satisfy our tummy (and for the peace of our minds) when we are the one paying for our food?

Last year, when the Asada family (cheesus i miss them 🙁 ) visited us, we went to a hawker center and had, i think, Fishball Noodles.

I also found a hair in the soup!!! (OMG why’s finding hair in my food such a regular misfortune? Was i a frog who killed a million mosquitoes in my last life to deserve this?)

Imagine there’s a hair in this Obriens’ club sandwich.

(Btw, it just happens too bloody often for me to complain. And my friends had warned me not to complain to those cranky waiter/waitress because you don’t know how they might sabotage your food any further back in the kitchen, thinking that ‘my cat just pooed on my expensive sweater this morning and my car died halfway to work, boss said no bonus this year then you freaking idiots are giving me a shit time complaining about a hair which is not even mine!!! Go to hell. *spits into food* Here you go a new plate of Indo mee’. Great.)

Then like usual, i chucked it away and continued eating.

Asada Okaasan stared at me as if a pair of green Shrek horns (ears?) just popped out from my head.

“OMG WHY ARE YOU STILL EATING THAT?” (in Japanese la. I forgot how they say omg.)

Imagine there’s a hair in this bowl of foie gras fried rice.

I was taken aback by her sudden strong reaction. (you know how Japanese like to have very kua cheong expressions one!)

She turned to Wilson and asked, “If you find hair in your food, you just pick it out and keep eating?!”

Wilson shrugged (a bit flummoxed by the question) and replied, “Yea normally i just pretend i didn’t see it. Even if you complain to the sellers, they will just say ‘haiyo hair oni la,won’t die one’ then pick it out and return it to you.”

Asada Okaasan looked at us, wide eyed, in complete disbelief.

“In Japan, if such thing happens, the shop owner will personally come to you, bow a gazillion times while saying how sorry he/she is, then replace a new plate of food for you absolutely on the house, and if you’re lucky, you might even get free meal coupons in that shop for the rest of the year.”

Haih. That’s why we love Malaysia lor.

Imagine there’s a hair in this strawberry panna cotta. Now you know how i feel?

Don’t even bother demanding a replacement even if you find a cicak inside your laksa. Because, who knows, that new bowl of laksa may have more than just a cicak.