I want a gangster bestie.

April 7, 2011 in Cheese-offs

or like an Italian mafia or a Japanese yakuza.

Because i’m so sick of getting bullied all my life just cuz i am 40KG and is a girl wtf.

What a shit month it has been, and the first week is not even over yet.

First of all i aged like a million years old because it’s my fucking birth month. Then i had to fork out a large part of my saving to pay for some charges for my house. And the stamp duty alone is like five fucking thousand. Stamp duty is seriously like the most absurd fee in the world. You pay like ridiculous amount for something you don’t even understand and get ABSOLUTELY NOTHING in return. The fucking stamp better be made of sparkly moonstone and can cure brain cancer. Because clearly whoever came up with this charge is sick in the head.

Then my neighbor asked me to negotiate with my lawyer about the price cuz clearly he’s a mature grown man who probably looks authoritative and convincing so i asked my lawyer for discount and did i say I HATE BARGAINING? How can anyone like to bargain? Unless when it is a noun. I just want everything labeled with a final price, save my time, save your time, OKAY? So my developer’s asshole lawyer said NO, and i was all, really? But my neighbor’s lawyer charge him cheaper and my asshole lawyer was like, Err, NO, and i was all OK FINE and wrote her a cheque, before going to the bank’s asshole lawyer to have them con the shit out of me again.

Most of the time i don’t even know what’s going on it’s just some stupid, grown up, complicated stuff i have to do as an adult when in fact i just want to roll around in my bed playing stupid zombie and nomming raspberry flavor gummy bear and dream cupcake rainbow hello kitty fat rhinos (which some people call unicorn, but i’m a bit more realistic than that) and talk in baby voice wtf.

And then i receive a call from someone whose husband’s BMW i reversed into few days ago. Ok it was my fault. I’m a shit driver which is why most of the time i make up excuses just to avoid driving because every time i drive i’ll at least get honked 5 times and there’s a 15 percent chance someone gets a heart attack or a dent in wall or a broken mirror. I even take cabs most of the time so that i don’t endanger the lives of careful drivers around me or cause stress or became the bane of road rage in KL city. I’m considerate like that.

But okay 3 days ago the 15% chance happened. But my car was completely fine and the fella’s bigass BMW only get a TINY TINY scratch. It’s really ironic that i have to cap the word tiny because it is so tiny i actually should have typed it in font size 0.00001 but then none of you will be able to see, so. So the angry driver got down and i was all apologetic and he and his wife were like oh you gotta pay for this and i said alright i will it’s my fault and he was all SHOW ME YOUR ID and i went all Denver the Guilty Dog face and fumbled in my purse and gave them my card and ID. Which i felt totally stupid after. Then i went home feeling like shit because i felt so victimized like i just got morally raped by some rich asshole.

So then today she called me and told me the bill came up to about two thousand ringgit and i could hear myself swallow the vomit back into my stomach. I went all panicky and dunno what to do and when i put down the phone i started crying wtf. And totally made a scene on twitter wtf. But then you guys are right la the assholes are probably trying to con me (as i always kena) because i am 40kg and a single girl etc etc fuck this shit. Two thousand ringgit can paint a whole fucking car. And maybe buy him and his wife some botox and a new conscience cuz they clearly need them.

And this is not the end of my luck yet. I haven’t mentioned that my BB is completely fucked it dies like 222 times on me a day and my PC is also fucked it hangs like 444 in an hour. Ok i probably have mentioned it somewhere else but this is me mentioning it again in case i wasn’t making my point clear enough.

Oh, and tomorrow?

I was supposed to be on a plane to Tokyo and 10 hours later i will be eating the best sushi in the world and shopping in the best mall in the world. But i’m still at home. What happened? Tsunami. That is what happened. I wish tsunami dies a painful death before it goes to hell. And get flooded by…. Tsunami From hell.

And a shark just attacked me from my apartment’s swimming pool and i lost an arm.

I’m not even making all these shit up. Maybe except the last bit. But if it happens to me i would totally understand because looking at the rate my luck is plummeting, when i walk out this moment a zombie would totally defecate on my face.

So back to my first point, which i kind of already forgotten, which is to recruit a gangster/mafia/yakuza bestie. So that i won’t get bullied. At least not by human. Not very sure about diarrhea zombies.

But what the hell.


Even my nail doesn’t agree with me.

Stored in Cheese-offs | 71 Cheesed

71 responses to “I want a gangster bestie.”

  1. Chrissy says:

    i totally understand how you feel!!!! adult’s nonsense and all. but maybe you can just report police and cost you maybe RM300 instead of 2000 and let the insurance pay the bill =)

  2. Chrissy says:

    and 2000 for a tiny scratch is nonsense too!!!

  3. Cherish says:

    Aww… 😳 Cheesie, cheer! Everything will be alright! It’s not you… you supposed to be fun & crazy… anyway, I hope you’re feeling much better after all these… Take care!

  4. dori_lukey says:

    just because it’s a BMW doesn’t mean it costs shit to repair it. Chill cheesie! You want me find that asshole drive and splash pain unto his house? hey how bout that, i can be ur gangsta buddy! lol

  5. dori_lukey says:

    Want help splashing red paint on the asshole driver’s house? or hang a pig head there :p

  6. Francesca says:

    🙁 im sorry … hugs
    i understand completely bout being bully cos of sizes. been there !
    i hope u dont pay those couple !

  7. SaeWei says:

    Hi Cheesie..

    Things will turn for the better soon..Hang on!!!!

    As for the stupid BMW bitch..tell them, it they want you to pay, most you can pay them RM200 only…if they want more..ask them to settle in Police Station.. tuna seng..bully you like that

  8. Lenny says:

    Aww Cheesie…I totally understand. You’re just having one of those days…where it feels like the world is against you and nothing is going right. But soon enough I’m sure you’ll get ur “lucky streak” back!

    I’m not a bad driver (I’m super cautious, my friends and my mom agrees!) but I always get super bad luck when I’m driving around town. Seriously, ppl should stop bullying small girls and instead pity us :((

    I know making money is hard these days and everyone wants to con everyone else, but c’mon that dude should grow a conscience! wtf would he do if he scratched someone’s car and they made him pay 2k for it?! ><

  9. fiionx says:

    aww cheesie *hugs* suay wan go already good wan mari :D.


  10. Amy says:

    Hang in there mama Cheesie! It does feel scary when your bills take turn gang-raping your pocket book. It might be easier on you if your insurance co deal with this. If their BMW is black, grab some nail polish and fix that scratch,(that’ll teach those punks) haha. *hugs*

  11. Chan Ho Nam/Kazuma Kiryu says:

    *big hugs* nemai i volunteer be yakuza/triad bestie…
    how do you want me to take out this asshole couple?
    want me take revenge on their beloved piece of shit beeeeeeeeeemdubya?

  12. eiko-chan says:

    Nobody has the right to ask for your IC unless they have the authority (eg, police)! And that idiot is totally ripping you off, did you take a pic of the “scratch”?

    Call someone who is “fierce” to go with you if you’re going to meet them, or anyone who knows about cars… try to negotiate the price or at least, to tell them off that they shouldn’t be taking advantage of you.

    The last time the exact thing happened to my cousin sister, she showed her IC to the aunty, and the bill came up quite expensive for a small dent… so she got my older cousin sister to go with her when she meet the aunty… in the end the aunty even apologized for asking for her IC, and she paid a little cheaper than the amount the aunty asked for.

    These old farts think because they are older they have the right to shove people around, bleh.

    Cheer up Cheesie! Your readers got your back!

    • meltz says:

      yea agree with u..that is what am going to say too..they have no right to ask for your ID..n 2k is seriously damn too much for tht tiny scratch..maybe u can try go around asking those car workshop how much will it cost to repair that tiny scratch for BMW n bargain price with them?good luck!

  13. jazmint says:

    u can go to the police station next time. and claim insurans. because 2k really paint the whole fucking car. if its just a small dent (or scratch) it will cost rm500 most even if its a fcking bmw.

  14. Ray says:

    Don’t pay the $2000 😆 You should have took a picture of the scratch. Anyway tell the couple 2k is unreasonable. Go to any paint shop to ask about the costs and tell the couple you’ll pick the paint shop. Don’t pay the couple directly. Either that or tell them to settle at a police station =p I think they rather skip the station =D

  15. KY says:


  16. WP says:

    You poor girl…everything coming at once :s Hey, hold auditions for your new BGF (Best Gangster Friend)! Like Paris Hilton’s new BFF…lol

  17. j says:

    Seems like he’s an opportunist, don’t pay! just let your insurance company handle it.

  18. Evie says:

    Poor Cheesie…. I agreed… don’t pay the 2k, it’s too ridiculous! Ask them to go to a trusted mechanic (try enquiring at GM motors in PJ Sec 16, they fix beemers).. otherwise settle in police station, paying the rm300 and a higher premium next year is still cheaper than 2k!!

  19. Evie says:

    Why my comment got IP wann? 🙁 can u pls help me to remove it?.. tks!

  20. Lee says:

    This is shit. I’m light weight & skinny as well. But that doesn’t mean we deserve to be bullied. So I don’t give mercy to ppl who tryna bully me or did that to me. I just cursed them :p lol lalala. I believe in Karma.

    I hope I can help you but I think from today onwards you don’t go out alone. Cos seeing that you get bullied when you are alone and when in shock you can’t find fight back (verbally). Bad luck must go away!

    2k is too much can get a branded bag! I assumed that they already fixed it and hence the bill you mentioned. Most probably those wicked couple took the opportunity to fix other shit of their car and bill you their expenses. We know KL is full of ppl like that. Just what can you do? Accept it as the way it is (be the gentle, friendly you and ‘swallow’ the bill) or ??? *sigh….. Anyway I hope things can be settled and you will go back to a cheerful you! GOOD LUCK !!!

  21. Berrylish says:

    Poor you! You should meet them at a legit mechanic to see what they say about the price.

  22. Glo-w says:

    OMG I wanna hug you… i fail during my 1st car accident and literally cried in front of the man. luckily i only had to pay RM400. But you should have some lawyer or car friends on speed dial. consider this a very expensive lesson learnt. From now you will be stronger and better. Poorer but heck ur good looking ^^

  23. sam* says:

    i totally understand how you feel. Being unluckie since the start of the year WUWUWUWUWU

  24. yenshann says:

    hi cheesie, did you think a picture of that tiny scratch? because it would be much better if you file a report at the police station…2000 is a totally rip off…can paint the whole car already…
    even when my friend made a totally huge ass of scratches i didn’t do anything…which in the end my parents cannot tahan and took my car to spray la…==
    and doesn’t mean girls are small have to be bullied…^^ i’m kinda shy in person but when i drive i become damn vulgar…sumtimes also kena horn la..haha…
    so don’t let these things pull you down, like what people say, when you get through the night, you would eventually see dawn…^^ good luck ^^

  25. kaika says:

    Awww *hugs hugs* Why your luck so bad de =(

    Never, things will look up soon! Like they say, nothing last forever. Bad will go and good will come !!!!

    Think of the money lost as some sort of money paid to charity. I’m sure god will give it back to you multiple times more :D!

    Good luck >w<

  26. yumii says:

    2k is fucking ridiculous loh!!! WTF one time i banged my car to a Nissan also, the ‘injury’ was a small scratch and the bumper came off by an inch. but the bill came up to rm160 only coz the lady said she dun want to cheat me by painting the whole bumper and charge me a thousand bucks for it, so she just fixed the bumper and case closed! and rm160 was paid and that’s done!

    these bmw couple must be out of their mind!! greedy greedy greedy!!!!!

  27. JD says:

    No way it cost RM2k for a small paint job.
    I once banged into people’s car and only pay 200 for it. Don’t get con for it!

  28. Chloe Wang says:

    Aiyo dont eat the died cat. RM2k can buy return air-ticket to japan, oh you should buy 2 one way ticket for both of them so they’ll nvr come back and shit in Malaysia again.

  29. moon says:


  30. sharon says:

    my stamp duty and lawyer fees came up to a whopping 11k.. i felt conned too.. totally don’t understand shits they talked about.. i only understood 15% of what the lawyer said.. fml.. anyway, things will just get better if you don’t keep thinking bout em.. it’s over and be happy! 🙂

  31. Audrey says:

    RM2K is fucking ridiculous for a tiny scratch, seriously. Reminds me of this one time my mum accidentally drove into some lady’s bumper and scratched it (yes, also a microscopic scratch). The lady freaked out and asked for RM350 and before my mum could say anything she was like, “I’M CHRISTIAN YOU KNOW! You have to trust me!” like it’s even relevant WTF.

    My mum had no choice but to pay up in the end though, ’cause it was her fault anyway, but kinda zhung gai lah all the same. Sometime after that my mum went to polish her car and apparently the scratch (since her car was scratched a little as well) couldn’t even be seen. RM350 is already a bloody con job, what more RM2K WTF. They’re clearly taking advantage of the situation and making you pay for their fucking paint job. Drive BMW but mentality like beggar.

  32. David says:


    Big hugs would help I am sure.

    The BMW driver is not a nice person.
    I am a bit taken back by your contant use of the f-bomb, truly a most unlady like word.

    You have a talent for using descriptive language and I simply ask why fall into using gutter talk?

    The Tsunami is long gone, unfortunate for your travel plans – truly, however you know how the Japanese are still suffering from the after effects.

    You woke up this morning breathing and alive to the world, you are very young and very attractive, more so than many who follow you and wait for your tips and advice.

    More than 20,000 souls in Japan never woke up today.


  33. vivienne says:

    take precautions!

    eg: dont let any other people ‘touch’ your ID whatever the problem is! even the police! what if they take it away and you become illegal immigrant and kena all kinds of stuff?

    if accident happens, ALWAYS call a guy friend to come over FIRST before anything else so that reasonable stuff can be done and not get conned..

    (and befriend a lawyer/police/military personnel =.=” )

  34. sarah says:

    Tiny scratches and need to pay 2k to paint the whole car ?
    Why not report police and claim at first ?
    Let that bitch wait for it …
    If u haven’t pay the 2k yet Don’t pay it…go police station settle..
    Claim insurance…

  35. Belly B says:

    I absolutely hate adult stuff too. I always drag them on till they threaten to cancel this and that. Then I get my ass up and do it.

  36. Shinnie says:

    I hate rich people who bully people because they are rich/strong/bad/combination of all enough to do so, too.

  37. Jane says:

    how old are you chessie?

  38. LL says:

    Awww! That’s so shit! D: I hope everything turns around for you!! 🙁
    I can relate to the driving, I’m such a shit driver lol. But at least you are considerate of your fellow citizens haha… i refuse to give up driving.
    And actually it seems like you are showing a mature face and good attitude (esp to bmw bitches wtf D:)!
    Keep being strong! Alot of people love you and your writing, and you’re contributing alot more to society than those petty bmw bitches wtf. Good luck!!

  39. K says:

    i hear u talk about the scene when you reversed into their car i already 😥 for you. so indignant la! *hugs*

  40. Estelle says:

    You sure are bullied by them! Anyway, you shd have gone with those couple to a nearby workshop to get the “damage” access and get the price right away with you being there! That way they couldnt have con you for more $ than it actually cost. I can be your gangsta friend, eventhough I’m jst ard your height and a couple of kilos heavier than you. Believe it or not, most are afraid of moi, haha 👿 I guess its the image one projects after all, I’ve always got that don’t mess with me look on 🙄 Even cops don’t pick on me but my friends, and once a robber picked on a hunky male student standing next to me instead of me(not that I want to be picked!) but just think its strange when someone robbing for money wld chose a student clad in tshirt, sandals and a backpack to boot whilst me standing there clad head to toe with my blingz and luxe labels was passed. Either the robber himself knows nothing worth of my stuffs/money i might have on me or he’s actually pretty smart to have avoid me, for i’ll definitely cause a scene. That guy who was robbed was soo quiet and walked back standing next to me before mentioning he has jst been robbed, almost crying. :dunno:
    So, project your mean-ess and be strong! :mrgreen:

  41. r says:

    tell them to bugger off. its just to spray paint. if in singapore i can spray paint my whole car for bloody SGD$800 for a cheap job, how can it take RM$2000 to spray his car? spray what? spray gold?
    they are just trying to take advantage of you cos you’re not standing up for yourself. it helps to know a little more things other than fashion & japan, to protect yourself. be strong.

  42. ShazzaC says:

    Aww cheesie, poor you!

    Like Chrissy said, you should’ve tell them ‘ok police report’. Pay RM300 and insurance will settle the rest.

    Screw the stupid BMW couple. Got expensive car can go around bully ppl? Idiots!

  43. nita says:

    that really sucks. and it does not cost that much to pain one panel of a car -_- they probably took it to some high end places and told the car shop to fix this and that.

  44. DODO says:

    welcome to the reality~ you are going to old age phase! you are becoming a woman..

  45. js says:

    WOW i pity u!! but ship happens to everyone of us once in a while and i hope u can overcome it! ^^ N u should totally ask for the car repair bill for the bmw so that u have proof that it’s really 2k.

    • Porcco the Pork Pork says:

      problem is, it’d be quite easy to get someone to fake the bill..malaysia boleh afterall!! :dunno:

  46. Veron Foon says:

    Should let the couple sent their car to the mechanic the always go, send it to yours instead.

  47. Veron Foon says:

    Shouldn’t let the couple sent their car to the mechanic the always go, send it to yours instead.

  48. wen says:

    you’ve been ripped off for the 2k repair.
    my bro’s car (a BMW as well) was hit by a car recently. the front side of the car was dented and badly scratched. the bill only came up to RM750 so a small tiny scratch shouldn’t cost 2k.

    get her to show you the bill and ask other mechanics about it or as make a police report as suggested above.

    hope you will feel better soon. 🙂

  49. CAroline says:

    i’m a 40 kg , married chinese girl and i know what u mean! Don’t worry things get better…

  50. michelle says:

    you should totally make a police report than paying 2k, robbering broad daylight siut! they sounds like con couples.. take care, cheeze!

  51. Sarah says:

    DO NOT PAY THE 2K THING YET!!! Its likely a con job.

    Ask them politely to send the car to YOUR mechanic.
    Drive your mechanic to their place & do a damage assessment.

    If they say no, just do a police report. No big deal.

    SERIOUSLY, do not pay up the 2k ok!

    Let us know if you need any mechanic recommendations… i am sure your readers will find out from their families. Better if its a BM dealer or sth like that.

  52. girl-next-door says:

    actually, in msia, when u reversed into other ppl’s car, it will NEVER be ur fault even if u reversed it ON PURPOSE..the driver of the BMW is at fault..HUMAN EYES are meant to look what’s in front..and if u r about to ram their car, they can HONKED to alert u that u’re about to bang their car…and flash back to the time when ALL DRIVER need to sit for the UNDANG exam, it is clearly stated in that book that drivers should always make sure that they are in a safe distance from the car in front of them…so who’s fault now? that’s how the traffic law in msia worked…so u can just ignore the 2k bill..dare them to make a police report..im not too sure if u would believe me but this was told to me by a lawyer..

  53. Songrae says:

    aww cheesie so angry f-bomb all start dropping already

    2k for a tiny scratch is frkin robbery. 2k is enough to buy a new laptop to replace your hang 444 times wan. but 2k cannot buy good laptop. eheh. You should go to the police. Easier to settle like this. DONT PAY K DONT GIVE IN. ROW ROW FIGHT FKING AYHOLES. I’m not tall but not underweight and have been described as “dam ganas” so I’ve never been bullied… because I hit back wan ><

    Cheer up k, cheesie? 🙂

  54. Oh :/ I hope everything gets better soon! hugs!

  55. Steph says:

    wow that was a shitty week!!!
    hope the rest of your month gets better~

  56. meikwan says:

    i totally agree! they always bully girls like us! grr… i wish i have a mafia friend too 😛

  57. Ker says:

    hard luck, gal! i’m quite petite but i yell at people when they tried to be overbearing. hehe. maybe u can recruit me as ur gangster fwen! lolz. anyway, bad as it may sound, but i actually liked your post! i went from *hmm what happened* to *hahahah* to *strike them ALL dead* lols. <3

  58. Charissa says:

    I’d be your gangster bestie. Maybe you should have a search, the way Paris Hilton did.

    But really, don’t worry about it. You have so many fans that have got your back any day 🙂

  59. natalie says:

    dont feel like that… your way too awesome to feel that way 😆

  60. natalie says:

    hope u’ll feel better 😉

  61. dabi says:

    Hope you feel better now…but have you wondered how you manage your life up until now?

  62. GYARU-TWINS says:

    Hey Everyone !

    This Is A New Blog Made Up Of Two Brand New Bloggers .
    This Blog Will Contain Gyaru-ness( of coursee),
    And Randomness ~
    Please Stay Tune !
    Support US! We Will Give Alll Our love
    Miyuki & Hiroko


  63. nha says:

    Hi Cheesie!
    I saw you were asking all that mystery symbol and i don’t know yet if you know what it means but i think i found it what i mean i found it on this blog =)



  64. weenie says:

    omg shouldnt let people bully you just because u are a single girl. girl power beeeech!! no scratch could amount to 2k that’s for sure. i say don’t fork out the cash

  65. Jul says:

    So how are you now? Feeling better?

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