It wasn’t even a joke. Unlike killing sixteen-eared raccoons for a bowl of Okinawa Soba. That was a joke. I mean, i will NEVER kill a sixteen-eared raccoon because ears are very precious. Plus we are allowed to eat squid right? Right???

Ok imma blog about my first LIVE SQUID experience. You guys should get a bucket or something. Just in case.

I had no idea what it was about i just blindly followed the native kareshi into the shop not knowing that someone’s gonna shove a LIVE SQUID EYE BALL into my mouth wtf.

The shop.

Owned by an old couple and they are just soooooooooo nice my god i love all these kampung people in Japan they are like your typical kind friendly Japanese just 1000000X nicer T__T

So the old lady owner brought out this squid thing in a plate.

IT WAS  STARING AT ME  i swear, and the black spots on its back was changing and spreading and shrinking my god all the time i was just staring in amazement with my mouth open like

=)=)=)=)=)

Apparently it was still (kind of) alive and still “breathing”. It felt like Davy Jones’s angry helpless baby.

So the owner cut some of its tentacles off and put it in our plate so that was the sashimi course.

I’m sure you guys have seen those Korean live octopus videos and this is like that, except it’s not as grotesque because squid is smaller and not so monsterly looking.

I waited until it stopped moving completely before i ate it wtf.

The bugger went, wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah WTF

And then the squid was brought back in to the kitchen.

When it came out next it was lying on top of six pieces of rice wtf amen.

 

 

And also covered in batter wtf.

Tempura and sushi was nice so i thought hmmm ok that was the end of the meal AND THEN!

The lady came in and said okay NOW IT IS TIME TO EAT THE EYES

=)=)=)=)=)

(My face was like that for the next ten minutes)

I told the kareshi “i am NOT gonna eat that thing” and he was like,

oooh, and i thought you love Japan? Seems like you don’t love it that much  afterall huh” and then feigned a disappointed face but then i caught him looking all like emo5 goddammit.

And i was allemp2  and challengedenied.jpg

 

For the faint hearted please leave this page and look at Xiaxue’s igloo eating a rosebud thanks.

But if you wanna know how squid eyes look like here it is:

(you are going to regret this)

.

.

.

.

.

(you still have time to back out)

.

.

.

.

.

(too late)

 

=)

(That was my expression, not the squid’s. Any resemblance is purely coincidental)

 

AND SHE SAID WE ARE GOING TO EAT IT

=)=)=)=)=)

Just so you know,  the middle part was the “mouth” and she made me touch it while it was still breathing and the brown thingy is the guts. Or whatever tastes like guts. Which i suspected you all ate before if you have had ika shiokara or chinmi.

emo5

 

Here’s another picture for your appetite.

 

So the lady said, to eat it you must extract the eyeball so she squeezed the eyes and it liquifies WTF and then she said that it was the squid’s tear wtf WE WERE GOING TO EAT A CRYING SQUID WTF

 

The eye went SPLASH and the plate was overflowed with liquid.

My whole body went soft like jello.

And then after it stopped crying it became liddis

A plate of tears, an eyeball and…. torn eye bag (?)

AND WE WERE GONNA EAT THAT DAMN EYEBALL SOAKED IN ITS OWN TEARS WTF

And i was like NOOOOOO I DON’T WANNA DO THIS but the lady was like it isn’t as scary as you think it is, just try it

And i was like NOOOO

=)=)=)=)=)

 

And that’s when the lady just shoved the eyeball into my mouth because my mouth was opened like that.

And then the eyeball melted in my mouth slowly until it became a solid stone, then i was made to spit the stone thing out and guess what the lady did?

 

“Now you have a new earring!!!”

 

And then she proceeded to do the same with the kareshi emo5

 

The end.

It was truly an eye-opening gourmet experience. LITERALLY.

No. Li-TEAR-ally.

So guys, that’s pretty much how much i love Japan. A live squid eyeball worth. I guess.

Kind of.

 

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