Catching up the Weddingmoon entries! This time it is Venice.
So after i escaped from Jesus’s house with a zombie, the danna and i jumped on a train to Venice. When we reached the train station, we had no idea how we could go to our hotel. We asked for help and a kind local told us to take the bus.
This is my second time to Venice, i love it so much more when it is warmer. When it was cold it was still romantic, but in a gloomy bordering eerie way.
There are also police boats around lol. I wonder if they give speeding ticket and fine people for illegal parking too.
Was sunset when we arrived.
Gondola Parking Lot.
And then suddenly i realized the danna had disappeared…. and reappeared in front of me as Johnny Depp (with a fake Italian accent), and hijacked a gondola so that we could rob a bank through a secret water passage, and then we got so rich we practically bought the entire Venetian island and built zombie traps everywhere. Just in case. Better be over-prepared than under-prepared when it comes to apocalypse. Plus Venice looks like a good place to trap zombies considering they can’t swim.
(…… can they?)
Except that it only happened in my head because the danna haven’t watched “The Tourist” yet. It was a pity.
Which also means instead of The Tourist, he could only be the tourist, ie buy Italian gelato and eat along the street snapping pictures of oversized pizzas and Italian rocks. And my husband is actually not Johnny Depp. In case you are wondering. Surprise!
And since we didn’t get rich by robbing a bank with our hijacked gondola, we were pretty much down on budget. So this was what we ate everyday. Italian sandwiches. We were not complaining, It was good.
Chicken & chips. They probably had a fish crisis that morning.
The gondola man should moonlight as fisherman too. I prefer Fish&Chips.
F1 race in Venice.
This is Italian hot choc. What the fudge?
This is Cray-zy. How shell i eat this?!
I’ll take weeks to finish one.
Looks like somebody poisoned my risotto but that would just be too obvious. So my best guess is somebody pretended to have poisoned my risotto.
One gelato, two gelati.
One gelato, many gelati. If this is Italian macaron, isn’t macaroni many Italian macarons?
I am so confused.
Had we successfully robbed the bank and became rich and bought the island and built zombie traps everywhere, we would then put them into a secured zombie enclosure, such as this one. The name would be Zombie… wait for it… Zoo.
The Zombie Menu may mislead people, but no, we don’t cook zombies hair pasta and make zombie flavored pizza. Are you crazy?? We are not that cruel!
It’s the menu for zombies.
Zombies are humans too, you know? Zombies are forever hungry, you know? I assume most of the captives would be Italian zombies, but i’ll translate the menu if we have foreign zombies imported in the future. Just for novelty effect. (“Limited Edition Zombie from France!! *Inserts horrible zombie pun*.)
We will feed the zombies stupid people caught from the internet, (by this special team we hire called the SpyderWeb), starting with the people i blocked on Instagram. It is a huge, flourishing business. Investments welcome.
And by the time the Zombie Wait For It Zoo expands, i’ll probably need to hire some zoo keepers, you all are also welcome to apply for the jobs. It’s all not too tedious considering you only need to deal with brain buckets all the time. (At worst you’ll just accidentally spill some zombie lunch, “Bloody stupid heads!!”)
The zombies are kept happy with fleshly served stupid people, we get a higher world intellect average, we have a peaceful internet, and job opportunities for everyone. It’s a perfect plan, y’all.
There’s just one problem left.
There will not be enough brain supply. Considering the quality of the people we catch. It’s like feeding monkeys banana skin, y’all.
So in the end the plan is massively flawed.
Fine. I won’t let the danna watch “The Tourist”.
Murano/Burano (can never remember which is which).
One of our zombie trap hot spots a romantic Gondola autobahn.
The not so awesome pasta. Our Cinderella pasta search ended the night we left Rome.We lived hungrily ever after, remember?
Oh my god i just realized i made us sound like zombies.
…… Are we, or are we not?
That’s the surprising twist of this story.
Now you can go review this blog post and give it a minus star.