There will be rounds of free drinks so just bring yourself and my belated birthday present!

RSVP to pleasecheeseme@gmail.com by 10pm Friday.

Please be punctual!

And it’s ALL ABOUT ME!!! 😀 (Picked that attitude up from a certain girl in MDG. Oh it feels good, no wonder.)

Now get over it.

Regarding the Red FM Red Babe contest, I just collected 10k worth of hair products that are going to last me a lifetime, some perfumery, and a lot of beauty salon vouchers that’s only limited to one person ONE time (which is worth 5k there already).

And i decided to give it all to you all who have in any way supported me during the show. I have this idea: I’m going to hold a little gathering soon, somewhere in KL, or PJ (venue not confirmed, any suggestion?). I can invite about 20 pax, so each of you will be getting at least a couple of bottles of hair products. I will try exchanging the hair products with the boss of the restaurant/cafe for free drinks if cannot then AA lo can? Email me if you are interested. 🙂

Update: Happy Mother’s Day!!! I’m sooooo in love with Ferry Halim’s games! 😀

I saw a squirrel. They really move so swiftly like the one in The Way Home. Omg Love Orisinal.

Then i typed an sms and Pacmeed it to my blog.

Pun of the day from London. I’m in Hydeing in this Park and the squirrels are all staring at me. They must think i’m nuts. O.o

🙂

Wtf. Each wooden post has got one birdie!

There was a freaking goose.

Feeding the freaking goose.

And the freaking goose bit me and took the whole piece of bread away.

I’m gonna force feed more geese and kill them alive for foie gras.

😀

Hie Autumn. Bye autumn.

Will be back tomorrow ok. With a new puppy for your birthday present.

No la. Just kidding. Scared ya didn’t i? 😛

Oh my god. Ringo, Ringo, Ringo. What have you become.

So many tulanful incidents have happened. I am cantankerous. The mere sight of a lousy movie poster can irk me to no end. I cannot believe there are actually morons who enjoyed watching crap like the Forbidden Kingdom. It sure as hell looks like a movie which after watching, you will feel like slapping yourself, registering multiple accounts on IMDB to sabotage the rating before developing a premature brain malfunction. What makes me more tulan is how tasteless people give shitty influence and tell you a certain movie rocks. Either they are really really stupid and have an excellent taste for movie akin that of a bean sprout, or they have a personal vendetta against you.

And the worst thing is, I actually went and watched The Forbidden Kingdom.

And when Jackie Chan in his ridiculous dreadlocks and ancient Chinese suit opened his mouth and spoke English, all hell broke loose. I pulled my hair and went insane.

A total insult to Chinese literature. Which after watching, of course, i felt like slapping myself, registering multiple account on IMBD to sabotage the rating before developing a premature brain malfunction.

I was wrong. I thought that after 54 cheesnimonous days of torture there isn’t any shit I cannot take. But I just realized that I’ve become so nastily petulant I’m entirely capable of blowing a relationship off over MSN. Before that, I swallowed whatever shit thrown at me. If I was in a good mood I might even lick the faeces coated floor clean. And now, you give me a bucketful of shit, I throw it at the spinning ceiling fan and walk away.

Cheesus. You know what? I hate insensitive people. And what’s with men and their freaking ego? Have they ever heard of PMS? Can they like, compromise a little more and be a tad more loving? God. And I hate overcooked salmon. And IBS. And hot weather. And restaurants that always close on the day I visit them. And the fact that I’m at Starbucks right now because I was stupid enough to pay RM98 for constipated broadband that doesn’t work.

Ok. Excuse me now because I reaaaally need to go throw my fucckaccino randomly at a barista.

Back.

I’m sorry. I just remembered that my period is due these few days. I’m going to be bloody mad. Pun intended.

Last night, CheesieMouse had a grotesque, bizarre yet yummy dream. To put it simply, she had a very cheesinomous dream.

CheesieMouse was crawling around in this desert somewhere in Japan, desperately looking for food. She has been starved for 54 days and 54 nights. She was sooo hungry that she could literally eat a camel – no horses in this desert. Yeeba yeeba hungry hungry.

From afar she saw a paper box that had a big, yellow letter M printed across it. Her heart lit up, hyperventilating, thinking that it must be a sign from above to salvage her ravenous existence. She dragged her feet to the box but to her disappointment, it was empty.

At the bottom of the box it said “Open Me”. To CheesieMouse’s bemusement, she pondered why there would be such a message in an already open box. However, with an ever growing hunger which was becoming uncontainable, CheesieMouse pried the box apart.

A genie with big, red afro, too much make up, smudged lip stick and a pair of shoes waaaaay to big materialized before her.

“Konnicheesewa, my name is Ronald,” the genie spoke, with one hand on his waist and the other 5 fingers spread out like a fan in the air.

“Uh huh.” responded CheesieMouse, not quite sure if she should pretend to be excited seeing a genie far too different from what she had imagined.

“Congratulations! You have just unveiled the most precious gem in the desert. I’m your genie. Now i grant you a wish. How may i be at your service?”

“I’m really hungry,” said CheesieMouse while staring at Ronald’s face. She couldn’t help but wonder why on earth would Ronald choose a foundation 10 shades too light for his skin tone.

Ronald replied, “Okay. Just repeat this chant after me and you shall have the best Dream Meal ever.”

So Ronald uttered a chant. It’s called The Big Mac Chant

“Two All-Beef Patties,
Special Sauce, Lettuce,
Cheese, Pickles, Onions
On A Sesame Seed Bun!”

CheesieMouse repeated after him.

Upon repeating Ronald’s chant and in a puff of mystical smoke appeared the wonderous meal.

.
.
.
.
.
.

CheesieMouse was awestruck, she couldn’t believe what luck had befallen her to the extent that she fainted on the spot.

CheesieMouse woke up, called 1300131300 and ordered a Big Mac. She then lived cheesily ever after.

Thank you very much.

Anyway, this is yet another contest brought to you by Nuffnang and McDonald’s! All you need to do is to verbalize the Big Mac Chant in the most creative possible, and take a video of yourself doing it, and you stand a chance to win the BIG prize of RM10,000!

Okay. This is a clear example of a video that is not going to win you RM10,000. Come up with something more creative please.

Once you have video-ed yourself doing the Big Mac Chant, upload it onto www.youtube.com and email the URL and your contact number to the contest master at BigMacChant@nuffnang.com before May 28 2008.

Have fun with Big Mac! 🙂

More information here.

P/S: Just in case you are about to scold me why there’s one girl in the photo who hasn’t had her head mutated into some yummy Big Mac ingredients (favoritism wtf!!!) , think again and you will realize that she’s the exact ingredient missing, thank you very much.

Okay.

*composes self*

This time i’m really a little pissed. For so many times i just shut the cheese up and didn’t even bother to defend myself. Say whatever you want, edit whatever you want, censor whatever you want, favor whoever you like.

But even my last words also you censor, a bit too much la. This is exactly what i said. And the bold part is what they cut off.

“I’ve one thing to clear up. I’ve read some comments about me being unappreciative and i do not acknowledge what my supporters have done for me, but that’s not true. *Because i’ve said my thank yous and made my dedications a million times BUT YOU GUYS NEVER PUT IT ON AIR. And I’m not sure if you’re gonna put this on air either. * ”

And i guess not.

Sigh. Reality shows. Pun intended.

Anyway. Bimbo pictures. This is the make up shoot themed Candy Look, which we did for Bertha Gallery’s make up students. We were the subject of their examination.

I tell you. After putting on slabs of foundation then removing it with make-up remover, steps repeated ad nauseam, my face felt like it was dying. Even the mildest moisturizer felt like sand paper on my skin.

Make up is eeeeeevil.

Commenting is off by the way. Not in the mood to eat shit today.

Mahathir–The upcoming most famous blogger in Malaysia.

How cool is that.

I asked Boss Stewie, “Oi, you not gonna rope him in as a Nuffnanger meh lolol” and he replied, “I scared cannot afford his advertorial la, it’s gonna cost like 100k per entry” lol.

Anyway, this is what i bought Cheddie for her birthday.

A pink CJ7. I think it looks awfully like her. While i was in MDG, whenever i passed by a soft toy shop with CJ7 of all shapes and sizes, i would yell “Cheddieeeeeeeee” and Dom, our beautiful chaperon would shake her head in pity, thinking that the separation has caused me sever hallucination.

Spot the difference.

It all started on this fateful afternoon, the day the wild monster inside me was unleashed and as it stood before me, demanded that her desperate cry be heard.

So on 25th June 2007, i brought another monster home.

It was the most adorable monster i’ve ever seen.

This little creature and i, from that day onwards, became inseparable. I named her Cheddie.

She had these cute pointy ears up until she was about four months old. A lot of people commented that she could not be a pure Maltese because Malteses never have pointy ears.

Then her ears dropped and blossomed into full fluffy flutters.

I brought her out for walks.

I brought her out on dates.

Some are shy and quiet and some are overly friendly.

I taught her tricks with yummy treats.

Days go by and my Cheddie grew into a gorgeous girl.

I took good care of her and her fur was white and beautiful.

Sometimes spoiling her a bit too much…

I know she missed me tremendously while i was away…

She still weighs an impressive amount of 2kg as an adult dog.

And today, Cheddie turns 1 year old.

Mommy loves you very much even if you’re botak.

And guess what?! Cheddie’s just had her first heat!!

She’s now officially a grown up girl. And now my Princess Maltese is entitled to occasional flings and ONS. I’ve decided to mate her in the future. So i’m looking for a prospect in law. Pure male Maltese only. Please send resume over along with a handsome photo. 🙂

Fine. While i was away someone came and sabotaged my blog. Then they came and sabotaged my dog.

Cheddie was supposed to go for a trim but the moronic groomer almost skinned her alive. She is now semi bald. I can’t show her pictures because she now looks like a freaking cat.

T_T

Then it dawned on me that i’ve broken a promise sworn on Cheddie’s white fur. Regret of the year. Also, you know the saying about doggies and their owners growing more and more alike? Well. We both lost weight and had our hair cut really short.

Anyone knows where to get hair extension for dogs?!?!666

Anyway. I’m super happy. Firstly for some politically incorrect reason which i’m not gonna say here. Secondly, thanks to all your votes, i won the Red Fm Red Babe contest. Last but not cheese, i received this!!

I passed my JLPT Level 2. The edge of the cert is torn because, apparently, Cheddie was happier than i was when the postman delivered the package. -_-

Happy Labor Day!

Including the Birthday Post. Yes yes i did get to read it. Thank you a cheezillion, all of you who brainstormed and contributed to such a wonderful virtual birthday party.

Cheddie’s birthday is coming up soon too. It’s on the 2nd of May. Any idea how i should surprise her?

Update

Bimbo post on the way, like it or not. 😀

My friends, call me and ask me out already now that i have my life back!

I was feeling a little like the old man who hung himself in Shawshank Redemption. I was starting to wonder if i actually remember how to handle a mouse and how to reply to an sms (huh, handphone? what handphone?) properly.

The emotions I was having were so mixed up it makes rojak sound like the most orderly thing ever. I was feeling sooo… cheesinomous (adj. Okay. I actually don’t know what it means but that’s is exactly what it means. Just a word i coined to express the inexplicable nature of something… uhm, hard to explain. Please jot the new vocab down in your exercise book, thank you very much).

I’ve been thinking what to blog actually. Definitely not something sensitive. Most definitely not something insensitive. Cheesus Crust. If i really do blog about everything that has happened and what i have felt during the cheesinomous 54 days, i can guarantee your mouse is going to die a horrible death of exhaustion due to excessive scrolling.

Give me a couple of days (longer than that, maybe, connection sucks) to watch the video clips (isn’t that ironic? we’re what’s in the show yet we’re the last to know what they actually show in the alternate reality) and let me see what kind of person i actually am, THEN i will decide if i want to write about anything at all.

Okay. Some friends have suggested I should have self-defended for any sort of rumors and baseless accusations that people have thrown callously at me. But i think for now thats the last thing i want to do. You see, you explain something, they counter back, and they expect you to bite their flame bait so that it may satisfy their desire for senseless sniping. If you don’t, they think you admit defeat. And if you do, they will come up something else for you to stress yourself over.

You don’t find it tiring meh? I do lo.

One thing though.

Regarding comment moderation. Please. I hope you actually watched enough episodes to realize that there was no cheesing internet in the house. How could you just so impetuously come to the conclusion that *i* was the one who deleted the comments. It’s blatantly obvious that for the past whole month, i had nocheesingideawhatsoever what was happening on my own blog. Even if i did have 5 minutes online i wouldn’t spend it deleting your comments. Sorry for the shocking revelation of the day. Undoubtedly it could have been done more tastefully and i apologize for not taking it into consideration before i joined the show. But please, stop scolding ME for deleting your comments.

Sekian terima kasih.

Sigh. I’m so tired. I’m dying to blog about something that actually makes me happy.

There.

I was happy.

I was so happy.

I was so very very happy.

Reminiscing it makes me happy already. 🙂