Shit post

February 23, 2007 in Just Punny

Warning: This post is full of shit, which content may severely ruin your appetite. Visit Cheesepetit instead if you wanna continue your CNY-Binge-Marathon.

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Ran down the supermarket aisle one day, and miraculously, all the food turned into shit. I’m not kidding. Like, all different kinds of shit. I think it has something to do with eating too much chinese new year shit.

And i suddenly turned into a scatologist who studies the appearance, size, texture, color, and smell of all kinds of shit, crap, faeces, poo, droppings, dump (I’m amazed at the amount of euphemism human can come up with, for something that comes out of an anal orifice).

So…. Let’s study shit.
(Research from a shitty website. Thanks for good shit that i could steal. Click for more shit.)

 
 

The Chunky Shit


The kind of shit that’s so enormous that you’re afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.

 
 

The what-you-eat-is-what-you-shit Shit


When you discover that some macadamias resides comfortably in your shit, you know it’s time to chew better.

 
 

The Bunny Droppings

(I know! Forgive me, i love Hello Panda too! >_<)
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.

 
 

The Liquid Bomb

That’s the kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt, splashes all over the side of the toilet bowl and, at the same time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.

 
 

The Pebbles-From-Heaven Shit


HOLY SHIT! It’s an adorable collection of small turds in a cluster, often a gift from God when you actually can’t shit.

 
 

The Jello Shit


The type that comes out like shining toothpaste, and just keeps on coming. You have two choices: a) flush and keep going, or b) risk it piling up to your butt while you sit there helpless.

 
 

The Shit Pool


This kind of shit is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor.

 
 

The Odour Bomb


Innocent looking (usually black), but sends out odor strong enough to stink Osama out from his tunnel.

 
 

Last but not least…

The Tough Shit


So hard, it’s almost crunchy. You have to strain so much to get it out, that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.

 
 

Thank you for your time for these crap. Wish you have good shit today!

Stored in Just Punny | 28 Cheesed

28 responses to “Shit post”

  1. naVICgaTOR says:

    Shit! I am the first one…

  2. WY says:

    lol! lawak gila!

  3. viviensiu says:

    *faint* you must be having a shitty day 😛

  4. converse says:

    omg so true….

    Some food *cough*number4*cough* will never be the same again in my eyes. ;__;

  5. Dave63 says:

    OMG; I’ve never heard so much shit in my Life. To avoid any further shit just Eat Cheese. Lots of if. ILMCAO

  6. Annie says:

    hahah such a shitty post. now i need to go shit

  7. sheon says:

    *gasp*…………………i need fresh air…………….i’m not looking at the choc snacks the same way again! hahahahaha

  8. asstha says:

    luckily i’m not a big fan of chocs… if i was… i’d definately be turned off chocs… scarred for life X_X

  9. Alex says:

    wa…sai mm sai ah…its STILL new year and alredi we r talking of shit…! but nvm la this call of nature every living thing also need to do, no need shy wan, u do she do he do i do all do…funny post.

  10. @-@ says:

    shit! im no. 10.

  11. mamami says:

    no matter how pretty you r, your shit still stink.kekeke…

  12. anilah says:

    hey,i havent laughed out loud at a post for so long! superbly funny!!

  13. Rainyuki says:

    oh shit…. I just realised that the entry i just read was supposed to stink, shit! >_

  14. Albert Ng says:

    Full of shit la you.

  15. Steve Suphan says:

    My grandmother this morning, was very upset at having seen her favourite brand of Prunes being compared to the odour of Osama Bin Laden’s underpants. As for my dog too – ‘Milo’ she’ll be barking mad……

  16. Paul says:

    Eek! guess I won’t be eating any of that for quite a while. Good for my diet though.

  17. kcin says:

    what’s wrong with all the above food? it’s not like you eat them and shit at the same time… 😛

  18. Qiqi says:

    =.=” So much of shits!

  19. babyfiona says:

    all my favorite shit!!!

  20. eveningdrama says:

    which would u rather eat ? ~shit flavored curry.
    ~curry flavored shit.

  21. Serena says:

    dear Cheesie..after reading your shit post, i started to crave for Hello Panda chocolate snackies! :p Just the other day i was at Popular Bookshop, at the cashier taking out $$ to pay for the magazines and there was it !! Hello Panda snacks stacked up nicely near the cash register! I grabbed a few packs of it at started chomping at home and feel so guilty after that 🙁

    believe me or not, now also i’ve begun to crave for chocolate cake with raisins. For some strange reasons, i started to crave for raisins after reading up your Kenko Diet plum write-up.

    You should do lotsa advertising Cheesie.. and be ambassador for lotsa products – Personally i think you have a very good pulling power Cheesie 🙂

  22. frank says:

    nice piece of shit..yummy! hahahaa

  23. ok says:

    ok….this is the only readible post ever. good job.

  24. Lynn says:

    somehow it bothers me more that it says grasshopper on the box of cookies than it does that they look like shit

  25. Dodo says:

    hahahahhahahahahahahah….it’s so funny tat i cant hold my breath any longer…i started to read ur blog after the mdg n realized tat ur posts are pretty amazing. It makes me laugh like like i havent laugh for years….

    M looking forward for more 🙂

  26. cheesie says:

    Dodo: I’m glad you like my shit! 😀

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