Foreveralone LVL 999

December 19, 2011 in Senti-Emmental

This post was actually written a few weeks ago after Aud’s engagement but was never published because i felt nauseous by how revoltingly pathetic it sounds and then also a lot of good things happened so i thought it didn’t quite tally with the whole gleeful atmosphere and should just be a secret post buried forever but for some reason i’m totally in a self-pity mood today so here, i’m all yours to scorn at.

Which is condescending seeing how i almost teared in joy on stage just two days ago, which also tells you how temporary the kind of happiness fame and power brings you, which is also sort of the point i am trying to make in this entire blog post.




So my #addicted got engaged. I was happy for her. She’s such a great catch that even *i* would marry her. Except that our love is only… platonic and… addictive wtf. And also wtf.

It was an amazing night filled with tears, surprises and most of all, love. Everyone was emotional and i was too overwhelmed to even speak. I was just very glad and honored that i was there when it happened.

But if i have to be completely honest, i was also secretly feeling sad. For myself mostly. This is not the first time i’m involved in a secret surprise proposal. The first one was last year for Mike to propose to Wendy. It was an ultimately nerve wrecking kancheong day lol. Then this time for Tim. I knew about the proposal 2 months before it happened, because Tim asked me for her ring size to i had to pretend to look at her finger and make up some nonsense wtf. Even though i wasn’t the one who actively helped plan it, it was quite stressful to have to keep it an utmost secret for 2 months from someone i’m the closest to.

After witnessing two successful and touching proposal, i can’t even blame myself for feeling a little pathetic. Of course the question would be, what about me?

There isn’t something even tangible enough for me to visualize that happening anytime soon in my life.

Although, technically speaking, i have been proposed four times. As early as 2006. SO I WIN.

Twice from the same guy, whom i have never met before, who printed my blog pictures out and put it next to a bible. Another time was a Korean guy who asked me to marry him after having met me for four days. The last proposal WAS A PRANKShit my life.

You know they say third time lucky? Well, shit me again.

Achievement Unlocked: Foreveralone LVL 999

Every time i make a joke about how #foreveralone i am, i wasn’t even exaggerating. I have been eating four meals alone in a row and am totally making a big deal out of it then everybody’s like, omg how come you don’t have a boyfriend and one even offered to introduce a nice guy to me HAHHAHAHA. Ok is that how that works wtf.

This whole… heart stuff is so strange to me.

The last person whom i felt that i could pour all my unconditional love to forever, and would love me back forever, was Koyuki.

Oh wait.

Anyway. I think that when God (if he hypothetically exists) made me, i’m pretty sure he was in a troll mood. Or high on drugs. Maybe both.

I bet he was all like, okay let’s give this girl an okay face (i don’t mean this. Or maybe that’s what he initially intended to wtf. ) and good metabolism that can burn extraordinary amount of cheese fat *stirs gene mix*, and then give her some wit *sprinkles pun powder*, and then make her famous and popular, give her enough money *drops gold*, and add some… oh wait i think this concoction is getting way too full LET’S GIVE HER A SHITTY LOVE LIFE *drains last drop of romance element out of vein*



Sorry this is really the closest i imagine God looks like.

I am totally bragging, but all these while (at least the recent years) i really have no major problems in life. i have what i think is the best job in the world, i have a few very good friends, i have no financial worries or family drama, i have a balanced social life, albeit occasionally awkward but it’s all fine. And most of all so so much freedom which i value the most, and which allows me to do so many things that normal people can’t. I honestly think i’m one of the luckiest people i know.

But i have zero luck in this whole heart stuff.

Of course i don’t mean i’m so hideous until nobody like me, i have also tried dating, but always no luck one. Can’t even be bothered to elaborate here. Seriously like, in the end i am still always #foreveralone until my handbag becomes my Plus One when i go for Porkgang dinners. It gets its own sets of cutlery. #truestory

I will always love again, but same thing will just happen until i believe Scumbag God is trying to make a point that this is, indeed, the trade off for me having an otherwise super awesome life. Now i am almost becoming an atheist of Heart Stuff.


I am sad and bitter. If possible, i would really write a letter to Scumbag God and appeal to him to re-shuffle my luck around a little. Take something else off. Less travel or less money or whatever. Give me back some heart stuff :(.

I wonder what rich, successful people who are happily in love worry about. I guess maybe ingrown toenails.

Maybe also, there are people who wish that they are in my position instead. I don’t know. You always want what you can’t get, right? Would anyone really trade love for something else? REALLY? I want to see hand, please?

Because to me, this whole heart stuff is really all i need now. ALL.

Shit me this post is turning more disgustingly emo than i originally intended to.

I really just wanted to let this out la. Sometimes it feels better to listen to other people having the same problem. Schadenfreude is my favorite pastime. Come, do some self-pity now. Tell me how your life sucks.

But i know la. Everyone says your time hasn’t come yet whatever whatever, good things come to those who wait whatever whatever, enjoy single life whatever whatever. Fine. Say it.

Say ALL those things!!!

Asshole T_T.




PS: Anyway. My maid is coming to clean my haos tomorrow. So i’m actually not that #foreveralone. Yay me.

PS2: I should probably also start investing in cats.

108 responses to “Foreveralone LVL 999”

  1. Isabellmiao says:

    hugs. like you said, what you don’t have, you want it.

    i haven’t been solo for quite some time now (not to brag here) but seriously, all i want is me alone. i could seriously use some #foreveralone time. 😳

    your post so emo make me want to fly back to PJ and stalk you so you won’t be so #foreveralone. 😆

    • antonet says:

      i’m interested to know you because i have seen your profile and ads and i’m delighted with alot of interest in you. I will like You to write to me back with this my email address ( i’m looking for a good friend and possibly a relationship peherps
      Hope to hear from you soon.


  2. X says:

    Totally got you. 😥
    I’m not even twenty, and I got the feeling that I will die alone in my apartment. Stink up the house, and people will only discover my body after a week. wtf.
    And I can see myself being a freaky cat lady when I get older. Cause I can’t get any company. But current me is afraid of cats. wtf.

    No luck in the heart stuff, not even joking.
    Not as awesome looking as you, not as smart/talented as you, not as worry free than you over finance issue.


  3. fresh says:

    i know how you feel :((((( *patpatpat*


  4. Eileen.G says:

    Hey babe, cheer up! i know everyone hates the feeling of being alone esp when all your friends have their love ones ard and sometimes, have to choose between u or them for a dinner or movie! that sucks! but then again, there’re zillion of ppl around wanting to be like u; wanting your fame, wealth, family relations and get away with those confusing love life! so, pls have strength alright?! 😀

  5. WaiLynn says:

    You will pity me if you know of my non-existant love life. As in zero. Completely zero. Of course I have guys who like me but they just get annoying after some time. And the guys I like will never like me back. #foreveralone lvl 100 And I have more female liking me than male. I have the lesbian aura omg just because I haven’t date any guys yet (I hope this will change) T.T SO.. Yep. Said ALL the things.

  6. sachichi says:

    oh, poor cheesie T_T you will find someone, i know it ! ♥
    well, this is not bad, but a few years ago, me and my friend both had a crush on the same boy. actually, at first the boy liked me more. but one day i just heard he was together with my friend. i felt like abandoned T__T during their dating, he came to talk to me on the internet (lol) and said he liked me more. i didn’t (luckily) believe him. i cried like soooo long, and felt like my heart was going to fell apart. every time i saw them together, i felt the same. they are not together anymore, and i still know the boy, and i know that he still likes me, but every time i see him at school, i remember all the pain he made me to face.
    i hope you read ALL the text
    ignore ALL the typos ! lol 😀

  7. Js says:

    Totally can relate to this post! My life is exactly like yours right now, except the fame part 🙁

  8. Simon Seow says:

    君は一人じゃない、 僕も永遠に一人です。このを君に上げる。

  9. Cholette says:

    Cheesie, don’t be so emo! :blush: 😥 I’m sure God has something planned for you already 🙂 You’re so nice, confirm won’t be forever alone! Anyway, it’s normal 🙂 Others have job crisis, you have love crisis, but really, I just feel that you won’t be alone! And I am zai hahaha cos I have good premonition skills! 😈 Love you forever, you’re my fav blogger.

  10. stella lee says:

    completely understand ur feeling, i never really have luck in love stuff either, suck la, never experience that kind of stuff :S
    I am always left behind on weekend, coz my friends going out with their lover, and all so happy, happier than they’re with me :-S so I just told em I had work or homework to do and do it by myself #foreveralone

    People say “no youre still young, still far, u just havent met the right person yet”
    urm, hello? You say that coz ure not in our position T_____T/
    I wish I would be lucky enough to be successful in this case, but sometimes I dont think that I will be hahahaha 😳

  11. Glo-w says:

    you would be perfect for a reality dating show! saying that, i can sort of relate. I’m stuck in a jungle and sometimes I consider making friends with monkeys and wild cats. I do talk to them but we’re just acquaintances. Humans ere made to foster connections i think. and having really awesome friends before made this feeling even worse. I hope someone finds you soon. Or mayb he did and you friend zoned him 😯

  12. g.ta says:


  13. melody says:

    i think i should say i’m quite blessed.
    not that i have the best job or even pay on earth but still truly blessed and i’m grateful for that
    but then the Love department is still missing!!!!! and i dunno how!!!!!!!
    its like Cupid did u go for refresher’s course or not!!!!

  14. Dylla Fadzil says:

    this xmas, santa will send you your mr right, hopefully hihi 😀

  15. ron says:

    i know exactly how u feel!

    in my whole 23 years of life, i have only dated one guy for 3 months and he left me eventually saying that he wasn’t looking for anything serious, and i was too committed to him.
    like wtf right.

    and now i have to face this colleague at work every single day, whom i went out briefly for 3 weeks, and found out that he’s just someone who dates around casually, and even refer some girls as ‘spare tyres’. i think i just became one of them. 😥

  16. zuzu says:

    i have a bf but he lives 4 hours away from me and we get to see each other maybe twice a month. i feel alone in my school because i’m not good at making friends and i’m lazy to put on makeup to school so i always hide my face when i see someone familiar. this semester i’ve been attending classes alone, having lunch alone, studying alone, drinking coffee alone wtf. it’s disgusting that i’m in my sixth semester and i actually have no close friend in campus except a few hi-and-bye friends. when i eat alone, i always pretend it’s okay or i’ll look around and see how many people else are eating alone. i always wonder what do people think when they eat alone. my roommate have so many friends i’m jelly. but i hold grudges against her and i don’t really talk to someone when i don’t like them. thought about moving out at least i won’t be locked out of my own house when it’s 0degree out there and cry while cleaning her leftover food which is covered with smelly fungus and have to throw imaginary tantrum so that my anger goes away. le sigh. anyway cheer up! you’re not alone ^___^ someone around the globe is also feeling pathetic like you lolol 😆

  17. David says:


    When you least expect to find a special man, and one you would never expect to take an interest in you.

    Very often the least likely person will become the best partner one can find.
    Someone who can be your best friend, can become the best partner for life.

    However the people one often thinks will be the best partner are not such. The unexpected male outhere could be the one you have overlooked.

    Most likely you have not met this man.

    Patience. Remember the pain and emo from relationships gone bad. A divorce is far more painful and always expensive. You really do not want such in your life.

    Praying for you and for your happiness!


  18. V says:

    Cheesie, I’m turning 24 next year, and have been single for the past 23 or 24 years. Right now I’ve got friends the same age as me getting engaged/married/having kids, and when I look at myself, I realise that I have nothing! I’m still building up my career, I have no idea how long more till I graduate, and I think I’m succumbing to the #foreveralone fate. I haven’t dated before, and I don’t think any guys have liked me/will like me. I’m always complaining about this, but somehow I don’t think my friends really understand how I feel, considering that they have all dated at least once. This entry really struck a chord in my heart.

    Maybe one day I should try my luck at those dating sites. But I don’t want to come across as being too 恨嫁! ARGHH HOWWWWW! T.T

    p.s screw CNY. 👿

  19. etc says:

    lol mayb if you stop dissing God n taking his name in vain…
    seek God’s love, divine love is better than mortal love.

  20. Angela says:

    I didnt want to sound like im preaching to you but why are you blaming God for the emptiness in your love life when you’ve never given him a chance all along? Sorry i hope this doesnt sound too offensive D=

    • David says:


      Your advice for Cheesie is sound, the delivery may have been a little awkward.

      Cheesie has never written about her relation with God. We do not even know if she believes in God.

      Whether she believes or is searching like many young people, she benefits from His love, as love is one His greatest gifts to His human children.

      Cheesie, has to truly learn to love herself, and accept herself for what she is. God does not make mistakes, however being the feeble creatures we are, humans often make wrong decisions and spend many years of living learning the lessons He has made very clear and available for all to learn. However we must have the desire and will to learn.

      I will always have a prayer for Cheesie to succeed and find happiness. She will have to find the path laid out for her. God will guide her when and if she accepts the guidance.


      • Fuck God says:

        Are you people for real? WTF? God is the answer to all is he? Get real! It’s the 21 century people! You need a move on, stop clinging onto fables and tales of God when so much of the bible is wrong on everything! Look at today’s modern world! We know that Earth is 4.6 billion years old; bible suggests its only a few thousand years old! Bible suggests Earth is the centre of the Universe; we are fucking on the corner of our galaxy, let alone the universe! You religious narrow-minded people need to get on with the times, seriously.

        • Yes says:

          wow another new thing again, how’s the bible being perceived by human. u dont believe in God, then just keep research what u need instead of babbling to people who believes in God. U’re just wasting ur every seconds here for feeling..whatever it is, im sure something not liking

          • Are you for real? says:

            Dude, don’t even understand you; speak proper English. So are you saying just ignoring all the wrong information sourced in the bible? Why don’t you mention that eh? Stop being ignorant and open your eyes

  21. Kf says:

    cheesie i love you <3

  22. Caryn says:

    Nawww cheesie.. hug hug for u k 😉

  23. Been single for four years+
    somehow as old as my blog :/ making it feels like its a blogging curse or something =.=

    oh, cat FTW!! support on that. 😛

  24. Tassia says:

    I can totally relate! It took me 25 years, 1 failed relationship, 2 heartaches over nonesense pseudo relationships, and a coupl other pseudo relationships before I found ‘the one” (of course, i would like to think that!)there were times in the past when I didn’t want to leave the house anymore unless I meet “the one” on that day. seriously. and oh, i forgot to add to the list above, it also took me one life-changing decision and major career change before I found him. i know this is cliche and all but love will come find you when you least expect it. just pretend that you’re not looking for it 😉

    i’m a new follower of your blog, by the way and I love the way you write! 😉

    -your fan from the Philippines

  25. Tassia says:

    I can totally relate! It took me 25 years, 1 failed relationship, 2 heartaches over senseless pseudo relationships, and a couple other pseudo relationships before I found ‘the one” (of course, i would like to think that!)there were times in the past when I didn’t want to leave the house anymore unless I meet “the one” on that day. seriously. and oh, i forgot to add to the list above, it also took me one life-changing decision and major career change before I found him. i know this is cliche and all but love will come find you when you least expect it. just pretend that you’re not looking for it 😉 i’m 29 now and that happened 3 years ago during a time when almost everyone i knew were getting hitched too.

    i’m a new follower of your blog, by the way and I love the way you write! 😉

    -your fan from the Philippines

  26. Kaila says:

    I soooo care relate to this so leaving you my virtual support. I know how it sucks to hear the all infamous line “you just need to wait.” I won’t be writing any pep talk coz sometimes it would just make my eyes roll. So I’m just going to leave a simple message for you to know that your not alone in this. Hopefully it would make you feel better.

  27. Shay says:

    😳 I know how you feel, sorta. you know, without all the travel and fame BUT I know what you’re feeling. Everyone’s dating, getting married, and having babies wtf?! I’m only 21 and I feel so far behind 😥 I guess I’ll just keep having lonely fun until I’m graduate college… wait… but then I go for culinary arts…. SHIT. Well, no use being pitiful. If Im foreveralone in the states, I’ll go somewhere else! HA!

    Don’t worry so much Cheesie. It’ll happen when it happens~

  28. JayMiemie says:

    Sometimes I look at you and feel okay, because you’re freaking pretty but no boyfriend. I’m younger than you but i feel the same way, budak2 today also married with babies. My life is good, but feel foreveralone all the time. I don’t knw la how to talk about friends likes to talk about boys but I shy.

    I pretty a bit la, sometimes I think people don’t ask me out because they thought I already got BF. Wakaka, but true story. FML

  29. Maria says:

    Hi. I´m mostly sure that you would never read my coment, but I want to put it.
    It´s the first time I write in your blog but I read it since… more less 2 years.
    I think that a lot of people can said to you that is karma, luck or whatever they want but I think that´s another problem you should see and solve.
    My friends told to me very often that I´m very good giving advices, well, that´s my adivice for you:
    “If you want a good man look for them” I mean, in an old post you talked about ugly people only would go out with ugly pleople… but, you know what.. there are a lot of that people they can be that ugly but there are the type of person who you don´t see them only ´cause there aren´t perfect who can be the most perfect person in the world for you.
    I mean, the beauty died with the ages but the personality never. In the future if you´ll be marry, why could you want a super hot husband in the past and now a shit-of-person-like????
    You have to see with other eyes to the people, and begin to see in them another things than beauty, money…
    In my past I was woth boys who weren´t anything but they really loved me and I enjoyed that time and I saw them beauty beucase I was in love.
    Thanks to that now I´m very happy with a person, we are together for more than 5 years and our story is only in the beggining.
    I know you can do it, because I read you and I know that you have more than a lot of people think.
    So, take it easy, stay calm and don´t go for super cheater hot guys, you know, all the girls know what kind od types are them and that a lot of women fall for that type all the time, and go for that shy boy who could be your friend for a lot of time, who is always there for you and ask you if it´s possible that you have a lot of good boys ner to you that you´ve never though of them ´cause “they are only friends” or a lot of other typical reasons…
    Could be that your man could be there or that you could find him in this kind and shy type, who are the best.

    Good luck and don´t worry a lot.
    You now that you aren´t forever alone.

    P.S: sorry for my shitty english, i´m from Spain (Europe)

  30. Shinnie says:

    I got what you want and I got none of whatever you have. I am dang.

  31. Jade Love says:

    aaaw, sweetie Cheesie!!
    I know how it feels to be alone, not have someone to hug, kiss, to be around you when you feel the need to cuddle 😥
    I lived the same thing 😥 😥 😥
    I wish I could help you, because you are such sweet girl!!

    and investing in cats is not as bad too :blush:

  32. Mimi says:

    Haha, Im commenting after a long, long time of just being a silent reader. Honestly, I think I can relate to you. Particularly about the “no love” thing. I understand how frustrating it could be sometimes. Especially that awkward moment when people around you started asking if you have a bf. Your friends ask. Your family. Your colleagues. Your bosses. even random people we meet somewhere. Sometimes I tried to act like it’s okay with single life. I tell people that IM FINE with being single. No commitment. Nothing. Just have fun with life and random people. No need to take responsibility and that sort of thing. And it’s not important to have a bf. Seriously, at the end of the day, it is important. T_T The thought of having to go everywhere alone and to think of who to call on festive days is dreadful. Sigh. Okay anyway, cheer up Cheesie. Always remember you are awesome. 🙂 Everything will be alright, really.

    Oh yea, congrats for winning the best fashion blog. 😀

  33. fiionx says:

    Cheesie, i guess a lot people feel that way, dont worry. The more you feel desperate for love, the more it wouldnt come. Just take it slow and enjoy your life, from there you will meet more people and try to get in touch with them. well, chemistry will happens sometimes.

    Good luck to you <3.

  34. DebbZ says:

    Cheesie, I think lots of people have been in your shoes. Feeling lonely and awful. I even got depressed when my younger sister got married last year. Mind you, she’s 7 years younger than me 😳
    I’m happy for her to find her true love and also proud because she’s so brave to commit in a young age. What makes me sad is that people pitying me because my younger sister got married before me. I got really irritated coz people keep asking me, when is my turn, why I’m not fast enough that I was left behind my younger sister.
    Some even very rude blaming me that I’m not skinny enough and that makes me ugly so there’s no guy is interested to me 😥
    Anyway I’m not going to say that your love will come soon and else to comfort you because nobody’s know. I don’t even know if my moment will ever arrived.
    All I can say just be strong and love yourself more. Please don’t focus or blame the flaws on your body because everyone have flaws too.
    You’re beautiful and unique just the way you are.
    Please enjoy your freedom as a single while you can 😀
    Best wishes for you Cheesie *hugz*

  35. cherrycoke says:

    This is how I have been feeling for a long time.
    I’ve been single for the past 24 years, more and more friends are getting attached/engaged and I don’t see any possibility of meeting anyone in the near future while I’m still pursuing Masters.
    However few suitors I’ve had…I’ve had no interest in because I don’t see a future with them, while guys that I secretly like will never like me.

    My friends and their parents think I’m very eligible but the reality is that my love life is non-existent. It gets demoralizing but I don’t really share about it because it sounds really pathetic to be complaining about these things to your friends. Yet I counsel my friends whenever they meet with relationship problems, even though I’ve had zero experience with that. When they start complaining about very trivial things in their relationship, I think to myself, “You’re in a relationship! It’s so hard to have two people falling in love together…get over these trivial things and cherish your relationship!”

  36. Tim says:


    So, a lot of people think that I’m a heartless motherfucker who likes to hurt people.
    Well, those people hardly know me. I admit that I’m kinda cold to people I don’t know very well, but my closest friends know that I can act like a crazy person and that I can be very sensitive and kind.

    It’s not that I’ve never had chances to have a relationship. No, I’ve had several chances, but everytime it got serious, I got afraid and ran away. Okay, I didn’t really run away, but I started to act really cold and indifferent to that person. And it hurted me that I hurted them (wtf), because they were people I was really close to.

    I also say to almost everyone that I don’t care about relationships, love and marriage. Okay, being single can be positive. You’ve got freedom, you can spend all the money on yourself, you can fully concentrate on your work, etc.
    But still, the thought of dying in my nineties, without anyone who supports me (partner or children) is just a terrifying thought.

    I think there is a perfect love for me, but probably that person lives on the fucking North Pole. Wtf.

    Just my kind of luck! (‘:

  37. Conny says:

    Hey Cheesy I never comment on a post entry of yours but I always follow your blog and read what you are up to in your life. That’s also why your post somehow suprised me. I’m just in the same state like you. :/

    I never have luck with my love life as well. My first boyfriend cheated on me the whole year we were together with an other girl. How I found it out? I found their sex-videos. Cheers to fucked up first experiences! 😀

    Afterwards I also got to know guys who were interested in me but at the end everything turns out worse. I don’t even want to talk about such love related things with my friends anymore. Everytime I tell them I got to know somebody new, they already look at me with pity and switch the topic, as if they knew it won’t work out. Now all my friends have a boyfriend and I’m the only one being all alone. Everytime I talk with them and ask them what they’re doing it’s everytime: ,,Oh I’m out with my boyfriend // I’ll go and have dinner with my boyfriend // My boyfriend told me he wanted to take me out on Christmas and I don’t know where we’ll go I’m so excited!”

    Good for you, but you know, the situation got so ridiculous that I’m already thinking:,,Oh yeah I’m happy for you kk I’m off see ya.”

    And I’m also thinking God loves to see me whining around. -_-
    EVERYTIME when I’m out clubbing with some of my girls, and a guy comes over to ask me if I had a boyfriend and I say ,,No”,they ask me:
    ,,But you are so pretty! Why don’t you have a boyfriend?”

    The best conversation was with my friend Julia. She asked me the following:
    ,,Do you want a relationship?”
    Me:,,Of course.”
    Her:,,Are you looking for someone who could love you?”
    Her:,,That’s the problem! If you search, you’ll never find someone. Only if you’re not looking for someone who could love you and make you happy, THEN he’ll come and find you. You need to be found.”

    In that very moment her boyfriend hugged her and gave her a kiss on her cheeck and she laughed happily.
    ME: -___-
    Like, srsly, fuck you. Sorry but no.

    Okay now I’m blabbering around but the point of this whole comment is that you aren’t the only one who is in such a situation. And I totally understand how you feel. I don’t have an answer either on how we could be able to find Mr.Right, but at the end, both of us may not give up.

    May… not give up… m(_ _)m” It’s so hard.
    Much love from Germany <3

    • C says:

      Now that just sucks. Who knew #foreveralone people are actually not alone at being alone FOL.
      One thing though, if we are all NOT to look for “love” then who the fuck will look for us? What sorcery.

    • Kaila says:

      OMG that happens to me too! they keep saying “The longer you look for it the more you can’t find it etc etc….” It’s annoying sometimes how they are so optimistically happy coz they’ve already found their someone.

    • Kaila says:

      Oh and when they comment saying it’s just because “you have too high of a standards” and your like wtf… it’s not a high standard… it’s just having standards.

      • 41607484 says:

        i often get yelled by my friends at for having such high standards ;;

        • Kaila says:

          I can’t even find someone average… its either they’re uhm below average in looks, or really high average (which makes you feel they’re out of your reach). Then friends would say… your so picky!!! and if you point out to them… what would you want someone like that. They would answer no because he didn’t fit their standards as well. :p

  38. Conny says:

    Oh, and fuck on the freedom of being single. Go through the city now on Christmas and see all those couples running around happily. Now don’t tell me that you wouldn’t want to jump off of a bridge sometimes if you see them. T_T
    It is the easiest thing being alone. But that’s also why it’s so special finding someone who loves you. So I would never describe being single as a certain type of freedom.

    • gunila says:

      lol truestory! 😈 😯

    • David says:


      My such anger and angst! I spent many years being depressed during Christmas and Valentines or any event where being a couple was important. Alone on to many New Years eves I know the sadness and tears that come being alone, feeling alone and wallowing in my loneliness.

      As long as I felt anger, depression or envy over all the apparnent happy couples I never attracted anyone. My desire to BE with someone, almost anyone was so obvious that it scared away any women with a degree of common sense. Who would want to link up with a tortured sould who did not yet accept themselves.

      Be happy with you are first, be happy in the simple joys that you see others share, and you might find males begin to find you appealing. A happy soul, a person with joy in thier smile and eyes become very attractive to others, and find themselves sought after.

      The unhappy and angry person, silently keeps people away.

      I wish you well.

  39. gunila says:

    Oh baby, I know how you feel 🙂 It really will be better soon! I believe in you!
    I was about the same mood before I’ve met my (then future) husband and … surprise. Wish you all the best and happily ever after!
    Anyway, it’s much easier to carry this burden while being young, beautiful, independent and healthy and so and so. You just have s great time waiting 😆 :mrgreen:

  40. Chubbz says:

    Hello Cheesie!
    I just started reading ur blog like month ago and I love it, blablabla.. so let’s get on this post!

    I totally know the feeling it is always similiar to me and so sad story, but u r still young u will meet your soulmate soon too! U r super pretty atractive great personality I bet there are at least 50 guys that want to marry u. Or more O_O
    I had like sad love story too, first I’ve fell in love with guy that didn’t even exist he was fb person and then it turned out to be fake !!!! I know it’s super stupid but I created a ideal person of him in my imagination and that made me fall in love with him, and it still sometimes hurts, and then I tried to like one guy from my class and ofcourse at that time he changed into some superpopular jerk and there it happens again I created a perfect person of simple jerk in my imagination, so u see there are many many many people that r trying to find ‘the one’ but don’t be sad, I decided to wait until he comes, whoever he will be, I hope I helped u, by writing my pathetic story and trying to make u feel better! So Cheesie don’t lose ur time on that kind of stuff, I lost a lot of my time thinking about loneliness and love problems, and it will just cause feelings of some agony ok hahha, but true. Be strong, sure your husband will come soon! <3

  41. Lyn says:

    I get that feeling sometimes when I open my FB and see friends getting married/engaged/having babies and then I hear my own biological clock ticking. I’m just one year to mid 20’s le. I thought still got time, still young but I would say peer pressure lo.

    Not that I’m ready to settle and be a wife yet. So there’s the dilemma. I want to settle but duwan also. wtf.

    So yeah, I get what you are feeling. Like “why my prince stuck in traffic jam! is he coming or not” ..

  42. Wendy says:

    Cheesie-chan, 頑張ってね。人生は喜びも、悲しみも、喜怒哀楽の全てをまさに体験できるの。あなたが大好きです。

  43. Allie says:

    Hi Cheesie 😀

    Ah I am only a little girl of 17 years (cry) so I am not in the same position with thinking about marriage or anything… but I my love life I still crap etc. Basically, all my life I’ve always had guys liking me, but it’s never for the right reasons. They only compliment me on how I look and can’t even have a real conversation with me, it’s annoying and stupid. My friends say I’m lucky to have so many boys into me, but it’s really my friends who are the lucky ones. They have boys who know who they are and love them for themselves, while I only attract boys who think that I’ll like them because we’re both good-looking or whatever. It’s dumb. :blush:

    Then finally this year I found a guy who I liked. We were such good friends, and I guess it kind of developed into feelings, but by that time he had already started a thing… with my best friend fml. I wanted to be honest and told him that I liked him, and he told me he liked me a lot back, but we had too much in common and I was too ‘beautiful’ and intimidating, he felt more comfortable with my friend (wtf.) Even thought I told him I was happy for them, I hated it so much. One time we both went to her house to watch movies, and they started fingering eachother, so I pretended to be asleep. AND THEN THEY STARTED MAKING OUT WITH EACHOTHER. RIGHT THERE NEXT TO ME. And I had to not move and pretend to be asleep while all that happened and I just wanted to cry. WORST. TORTURE. EVER.

    Anyway, that’s not really my point, but here it is: my pathetic love life is pathetic and thinking about it depresses me a lot. BUT, however lame and cheesy (!) this sounds, I swear it’s the truth… whenever I start to feel horrible and #forever alone, you know who I think of? Cheesie! Yeah I sound really dorky but whatever. I really do look up to you, you know (/random stranger lol.) You’re so cute and beautiful, all of your clothes are perfect, your house is so nice, you have so many good friends, and you always seem happy, even when you have problems. You are exactly the type of person I want to be, and whenever I start to hate myself and my life for being single and lonely, I stop and think of you. I tell myself, ‘Cheesie is perfect in every way, and she doesn’t have a boyfriend. If she doesn’t need one to be happy, then neither do I.’ Thinking of that reminds me that I don’t need to lower my standards and settle for a guy just because that’s what other girls do… I’m sure it exists in other places too, but here in America there’s a semi-belief that girls can not really be happy unless we have a boyfriend by our side. When I think of you, though, I know that isn’t true. Seeing all the happiness you have without a significant other has made me a stronger, braver, and more fulfilled girl.

    I really really hope you find the person right for you soon. Of course he is already out there, it’s just a matter of meeting him and then you will have instant happy 😀 God only has to troll you for right now because when you have Prince Charming, your life will be so extremely perfect that he has to tease you for right now, of course!

  44. Riri says:

    It’s totally cool that you WANT love, but I think that a love life is totally unnecessary in today’s society. Single people have great careers, great social life, great family life due to staying close to parents+siblings (and friends that become like family). Can even raise kids through adoption or artificial insemination (or just randomly get knocked up wtf). Marriage is unnecessary. I think that “older” single people are just frowned upon by society because of the who “pathetic” factor, which I find totally unfair. True, there is something pathetic about not being able to find someone willing to love you, but I think there is a difference between that, and just unable to find someone compatible. The first one means that you’re so ugly no one is even willing to give you a chance, and that’s kind of pathetic. But barring that, being unable to find love just means you have standards and it’s hard to match them. Nothing wrong with that. Call me shallow, but appearance counts for 90%, and if you are not ugly, fat or mutated, then life is fine. So just be hot enough that no one can honestly say “she’s single because no one is attracted to her.” And you, Cheesie, totally are!
    I don’t know, I’m definitely in a different generation than you, since at 20 I guess I don’t have as mature of a mindset as you. But for now, your life is amazing and you’re totally making something of yourself, so don’t feel discouraged! Since you feel so strongly about having a significant other, then I believe that you’re totally meant to have one. The right one will come! Don’t rush and settle for someone not worthy of you wtf.

  45. Erica says:

    I love love my boyfriend but I wouldn’t mind to trade a bit of that love(? I guess love?) for some fame and popularity. Since my few close friends all have boyfriends now, we never hang out anymore, everyone’s just with their boyfriends all the time. I guess I would trade a little love for some more balance in my life.

  46. cheesie says:


  47. KY says:

    embrace the kittehs!

  48. lonely_Mi says:

    u r not alone, my dear.. i’m going to be 32 nxt yr.. n i’m still #foreverlonely 🙁
    same.. everything else in life seems fine.. jst the love luck.. haiz… jst could meet the right guy for life!!! >.<
    when everyone else ard get married, hv kids, attending countless weddings.. everyone else attend as couple, im still #foreverlonely 🙁
    it sucks….
    at least u still hv lotsa lotsa fans out thr.. not so lonely afterall…

  49. don’t worry. i’m 22 and have zero exp. in relationships.

  50. Ayah says:

    awww. don’t worry cheesie. you will have what you want sooner. may be not yet now. soon! 🙂
    i know how you feel but I am not letting it into my head. i know someone out there is just too afraid to come near me at the moment. yay:D

  51. Rara says:

    Awww… yeah i know that feeling.. especially when most of my friends got married or have bf. They don’t have time for you anymore T_____T

    but anyway cheesie, just enjoy whatever whatever.. u go travel maybe you will find your other half in another country.. hehe…

  52. O says:

    Yups, I think I am in the same boat with you nowadays. As age seems to catch up, most people around me are either attached “stablely” or married (with kids). I guess the only way to cope is to stay strong and don’t give up waiting, hoping or searching for the right one? It seems hard maybe, but that’s the only way right now I guess. There is also another side of the story, I mean I am sure if you allow, there are many admirers out there that’s willing to get to know you more. But sometimes, we just want to choose who we want to love and to be loved back by that someone particular.. Don’t you think so? There are always many Tom, Dick & Jane around..but somehow or rather those who’s always around doesn’t seems to catch our attention. Sometimes we rather be alone than simply settle for anyone not suitalbe that comes our way. It’s abit similar to the analogy of choosing a right fashion for yourselves. some clothes/dress that you never get fed up wearing it. 😛

  53. mm says:

    Merry Christmas and Good Luck to you!! 💡

  54. Tey Cindy says:

    you are not #alone. people just don’t have the time / freedom to feeeeel #foreveralone. so you are still #lucky. #win!

  55. Joyc says:

    I hope this helps.
    skip on read 4

    I’m not sure I’ve ever met someone who went their whole life without a “significant other.” But I’ve met plenty of people whose dates took an abrupt halt when they let slip with, “God, before you came along, I was just close to putting a gun to my temple and- oh, the steak is finally here!”

    You have to relax. It turns out some lessons taught by romantic comedies aren’t full of shit: Concentrate on taking care of yourself first, because 90 percent of a relationship’s success is a matter of maturing into the type of person other people want to be around.

    Read more: 5 Reasons Life Actually Does Get Better |

  56. Michelle says:

    OMG I feel like crying after reading all these comments! Such lovely people out there! I will never trade LOVE for anything. But Cheesie don’t give up, sometimes all you need is an open heart and the right timing. Love is already out there and perhaps it is already around you 🙂

  57. yasmine says:

    Shit yo, I know exactly how you feel. My so called “love-life” or lack thereof is the saddest most pathetic thing ever. I have like a couple of guys and been in love with one guy. I confessed to them all and they ALL rejected me (at least I can pride myself on having the guts to tell them -___-). What sucks even more is that the one I was in love with actually gave me the “It’s not you, it’s me” speech.

    I just want to be loved by someone but I don’t understand why it’s so damn hard to find a guy. FML.

  58. Caroline says:

    Hi Cheesie!

    i totally understand how you feels right now. I’m 29yrs old this year but i have been alone too. I also tried to love someone but it end up wrongly in the end. so sad huh 🙁
    That’s why friend is very important to me now.
    I still have hope that GOD will arrange me to meet someone special soon if not now.
    Hope that you will also found your real love one.
    Cheer up! luv*hug

  59. Jasmine says:

    The feeling of lost and alone is totally normal when your best ji-mui is getting married. You felt like you have lost her and she can no longer be always available when you need her like she always be. But your time will come Cheesie. Not everyone is meant to find love early. Maybe it’s just a challenge from God that He wants you to look for your Mr. Right a little while longer. So just be patient Cheesie, he’s definitely waiting for you some day.

    p/s: I can be your friend if you want to. 🙂

  60. Ping says:

    Cheesie, you know how shuck I am too in heart stuff so you are not alone. Honestly, I feel I’m jinxed that I will never have someone of the opposite sex that will say “I love you” or that I ever gonna to settle down (nope, my family doesn’t know about this ‘cos if they do, they will freak out cos I’m the last child to settle down and yet I’m still single).

    *big hugs!*

  61. MilkySorbet says:

    At least you have money, travels, and popularity.
    Think of all the people who have neither that nor love ;___;

    And everyone who’s saying “He’s somewhere out there, can’t be long now, only 48340295759302845750385 more years!!!11!1” is a troll anyway.

  62. yaney says:

    i feel you Cheesie~~~ 😳
    i’ve been reading your blog for half a year i guess and i admire you and Xiaxue you’re both famous, pretty and awesome~ i would’nt need a love life if i have a life like yours~

    if you think your life is pathetic in the heart stuff department then what do u call mine now? i’m already 25 and i’ve never ever been in a relationship.. im one of those girls who are a part of the so-called “NO BOYFRIEND SINCE BIRTH”… and i actually haven’t even courted.. like seriously being courted. and the guys i like will never like me back~ sad story…

    so yeah, i’m busying my life with work and my fandoms… that’s where I get happiness.. and of course with friends

    but sometimes i can’t help to feel sad and lonely when all your friends are dating and happy with their boyfriends/partners while I is #foreveralone like wtf. I know i’m not ugly but why the hell i don’t have someone by my side? i feel like i’m the most unattractive girl~and nobody wants to be with me… :dunno:

    Cheers Cheesie.. i know your Prince will come along sooner than you expect it.. who knows maybe next year? 😉

    • antonet says:

      i’m interested to know you because i have seen your profile and ads and i’m delighted with alot of interest in you. I will like You to write to me back with this my email address ( i’m looking for a good friend and possibly a relationship peherps
      Hope to hear from you soon.

  63. ForeverAlone#2 says:

    hey there. I can so identify with this post of yours. Seriously, what’s wrong with us? I look at gals like us, we look pretty fine or maybe pretty pretty even on the outside and we should have quite a good character as well, but why do we so lack this part of life? And worse, if we meet jerks.

    It’s sickening isnt it when ppl come saying, oh u just havent met the right guy yet, ur time has not come yet blablablah.

    I think I may have even reached the point of my life when I really have just given up on anyone. I am trying to be happy doing other things, though I still have that tiny hope hidden somewhere down in my heart. Hope you will too my dear =) And FYI, I am 30 next year, sometimes I feel like banging the wall. But it’s ok it’s ok I tell myself, I wont let that define who I am.

  64. yoyogirl says:

    I am your age (born in 1984) and never had a proper relationship before. HAHAHA, now you know how lucky you are. Got proposed 4 times!!

  65. zOee says:

    Just one word (4 words to be exact) – WE LOVE YOU CHEESIE!! :cheh:

  66. suli says:

    as what you said, what u don’t have, you want it.
    i have never been in a relationship and im 23 this year. every weekends i will be at home alone. i just talked to my mom few days ago telling her that i feel that i will be alone until i die, and will be living alone, im afraid that i will die alone in my house without anyone noticing until my whole house stinks and only people discover my body.
    my sister who is younger than me already have a boyfriend and she will go out every weekends, last time when she’s single, we will go out together but now im forever alone. seeing her with me boyfriend so happy together makes me feel sad coz im alone. now whenever i wanna go out i will ask my mom to go out with me as i have few close friends and they already have boyfriends.

    i hope everyone who is #foreveralone will find their love soon! *hugs*

  67. Hiya!

    I suppose I’ve told people this story way too many times before but not because for pity but rather for hope and faith.

    I used to date this girl for 5 years. Wasn’t an easy one I tell you,when I got together with her there was a huge baggage that came with her (ex bf, debts, you name it). Still I took it hard but because I really cared for this girl I went all out to try and make her life better. Helped her with ALL her problems and pretty much spent the entire time of our relationship facing each and every one of them obstacles. Even told my parents that I was going to marry this girl.

    Reason why I did it is because I honestly and truly believe that if I was a man in a relationship I cared about, I don’t back down from problems like this.

    that lasted for 5 years ++.

    and then one day she got bored of me and left. no talk, no discussion, just a “its over” SMS. better yet, she actually left me for another woman. yup, thats not a typo.

    usually this would be a great time for me to find the deepest darkest corner I can find, wrapped myself in my fav blankie and cried my heart out. but I was lucky I had frens to tell me to screw her for what she did and move on. period.

    Today, I’m with someone that every single cliche’ movie tag line would not be enough to describe how I feel for her and she makes sure everyday she tells me the same thing as well.

    Moral of the story? If an boring, out of luck, average looking guy like me can find the one even after getting kicked in the kahones grande by a bitch of that magnitude, I am sure a person as loveable and a bubbly personality like yours would find one as well.

    true story. 🙂


  68. Cass says:

    Hi Cheesie! It’s alright! I’m foreveralone too so all of us foreveralones can band tgt then not alone anymore LOL!!! I get how we always want something we don’t have…yet! My advice is cliche but I still must say it – a super good guy WILL come eventually so meanwhile, just enjoy the other awesome things u have now! 😀 Actually, this time 2 yrs ago, I was feeling foreveralone cause my friends were all getting hitched and I’m… let’s just say even my mom asked me if I was lesbian -_- Then I went to a new school and a few guys started chasing me. It was quite interesting at first (cause it was my first time T_T *asexual*) but then, all the cheesy (sorry :x) gross crap prepubescent guys do followed. I’ve now graduated from that school AND shaken off those people so I feel totally grateful for single-hood!!! Manz…I think a good way to feel better is to just think of the bad side of being attached…which is aplenty to me cause I’m still in the guy-hate phase. HAHAHA.

  69. miracleangel says:

    Cheesie!! I totally can connect with your post and feel you! I guess I’ll have to thank you for making me feel less lonely, to know that other people too are going through what I’m going through! Hehe Hope the two of us can find our prince charming soon! 😉

  70. kane says:

    Do I need to drive a Reventon to marry you?

    Next year maybe… 👿

  71. Myn says:

    I’m fovereralone that I think now I should work hard to earn more money and save more money so that I got more money to select a high class “rumah orang orang tua” in future, rather than just a bed, or sharing TV, I want my own pink private room with own TV, bathroom with jaccuzzi (wtf). Sometime it really do scare me, if my life fated to be alone and I need go through the life all by myself alone…I really had think that if I’m destined to be like that, I will choose to live in rumah orang orang tua, at least there are foreveralone gang that accompany me. I really can feel you, as it is exactly the same what all I want now is love, but yet…..sigh…

    • joey says:

      HAHAHA I LOL at your comment!!

      p/s please book me a room at the pink high class rumah orang tua too thank you very much *foreveralonetogether<3*

  72. LoveSiee says:

    Hye there Cheesie 🙂

    Its alright to feel emo at times. The reality about this world is that, there always ups & downs, thats the reality for me I should understand & take, in order to go through this tough life. But dont be so emo until u imagine –urself die alone in a apartment, stink up the house, and people will only discover ur body after a week (like the 2nd cheesed said from ‘X’)– Annnd its dangerous to actually put ur imagination into feeling because it might turn imagination into reality ..yay. Im not trying to frightens here. Its true, mind control is powerful ! 😯

    I experienced 2 serious relationships, I guess.. I assumed them serious because those relationships survived beyond a year. The 2nd relationship stands for 5 years & few months. It started 2004 (16 year old me), ends around early 2009. During the 5 years, I always want myself to be a single. Reason why??? Well, Im only a teenager that time, everyone know (especially those who are with mom & dad status 😉 ) how teenagers’ minds are, not eligible yet for serious relationship. Then how can the relationship survived until 5 years???, is because who I am making the choice. Simple as that. We’re responsibility for our own life right.

    After I ended that 5 years+ relationship on that early 2009 (21 years old me), I went single for only THREE months ! And im back to ‘in a relationship’ status, with a new guy, whattaaa~? Amazingly, he is the one 🙂

    Now, we’ve been together for 2 years & 3 months. Officially as my fiance now 🙂 Why he is the one, because I see myself in him, which means, we’re almost have the same behaviors, specifically, we have slightly the same temper, which when that happens, I could make decision what to do & what not to do when he’s in his temper. Isnt that great? 😀 Understanding is the key to a successful relationship 🙂

    Not to deny, we do experienced hard time together too, things like that not exempt to happen in relationship. Thats the reality. Accept the reality & deal with it. For me what I do when hard time comes, well, you might want to know which problem-solving method inspired me the most & none other thing will do, its from the bible verse 1 Corinthians 7:5, “Do not withhold yourselves from each other unless you agree to do so just for a set time, in order to devote yourselves to prayer. Then you should come together again so that Satan does not tempt you through your lack of self-control.”

    Yes ! Thats exactly what we do. We take time to be alone for days, even weeks, we take time to pray, and get back again like normal, but only with more strengthen relationship than before 🙂 Now, we only need a day to settle problem 🙄

    So Cheesie, dont think that u are forever alone, even people in a relationship also need to be alone sometimes. You got me 0_o? Thats the message Im trying to deliver to you 🙂 When u are feeling sort of this emotional again, remember that, u have a lot more interesting thing to discover. When u are helping ur friends for surprise proposal, please to know that, they will remember ur helping hand, they will smile when they remember you. In the same time, u got experienced, which this experience will be needed in giving u idea to make ur love one happy in the future. My 5 years + relationship experience helps my present & future a lot 🙂 Go & learn what are the criteria that actually save the relationship & marriage. For me, I always got inspired by the bible verse. Dont layan ur emo anymore, 1 hour of emo-ing is enough to make u look old & sick, and it kills brain cells too ..yay. It’s true, enjoy your single life, instead of finding love in vain again and feel bad about it and you will never understand why is that. Save it Cheesie. I hope u’re happy now. Im glad u have the guts to share this. Take care you ! 😉

  73. Radiance says:

    Sometimes eating alone is a relief for me, because I eat so damn slowly. But it’s definitely fun to eat with friends. And sometimes I wish there was this special someone to eat with. Of course there will be this urge, if not how the fuck is the human race gonna proliferate?!

    The urge passes by after a while, and I always tell myself, “I just haven’t met that special someone”, which could be true or just an distraction from the real “no one wants me!”. But then again, I think hard and I realise that, I’m just scared. I don’t dare to open my heart. I just want someone to open my heart for me. I’m such a lazy ass!

  74. sin says:

    wow, you wrote everything i have been feeling for the last 3 years….

  75. Sara says:

    I completely know how you feel. ): To a greater extent, perhaps, because unlike you I’m definitely not pretty or anything…. Haha I know what you mean by schadenfreude though, I gain some small sense of relief when I see that other people may have it as bad as me. Or somewhere around there…

    Especially as a teenager, this feeling of forever alone-ness is sooo pronounced it’s like a tsunami over Singapore. I mean, all my friends are coming to me and telling me about how many guys are chasing them, or how many guys HAVE chased them or what guys are doing for them to get them to be theirs… and in my entire life of 18+ years I can count the total number of guys who have ever chased me with a single hand. Heck, not even. With a single finger. )));

    And I mean like, they always say “Oh don’t worry your time will come.” but what I can never understand is, at your supposed ‘prime’ i.e. youth, if no one likes you, then you know, what more when you are older and possibly fatter/wrinkly etc?? Kinda feel like your youth is wasted aye. And because all your friends are happily engaged in their love lives (either attached or chased, either way same thing at least people show interest) you can never legitimately pour your heart out to them, because how can they ever understand that feeling of being unwanted?

    So yes, I completely feel you!! It’s quite sad but… oh well. ): I’m sure that something will happen for you soon though, I mean you’re so pretty and such a genuine person. Of course my words might not comfort you but… ah well.

    Sorry for the long comment!! It’s just that there’s so much bottled up it all spilled out at once. Haha! Oh and congrats for the win. (: So happy for you!!!

  76. Swee says:

    #bitchplease.jpg at least u have everydamnthing else. 😥 #Foreveralone group hug

  77. Angie says:

    I feel you and prob every foreveralone ppl out there. I mean i’m at home on weekends just 9gagging, am even on the vote page. Le sigh. My mum’s been and telling all my relatives that i’m single and no guy wants me. I’m like FUUUUUU! I have friends, but friendzoned!

    The guy’s out there, i know it, just need to find him. Maybe he’s not in Malaysia?Gah so annoying.
    But at least for now, there is still 9gag! 🙂

  78. RT says:

    Hello Cheesie! 😀

    I feel exactly like that! I get all sad when I see happy couples. I’m a sucker for love! I tear when I see proposals, and when my friends tell me how happy they are in their relationship, and what their bf did for them, yeah I’m happy for them. But secretly I’m just crushed. Thinking when will my day come. And every time I start seeing someone, things starts getting fcked up with that person.

    Just recently got out of a relationship but I’m still trying to get him back. Though it may make me sound cheap but he’s been all I wanted, we had something since high school, then now we’re back on track but well obviously off track again. Third time is a charm? We were so close when we were together, so when things went wrong, I never felt more alone than this. F it, I don’t even know how to express how horrible it is to always feel alone.

    In relationships I’m always the one who cared too much, do too much, love too much. Maybe it’s not a good thing after all. Maybe guys like bad girls. They dont like girls who think/care for them. I get dumped for the stupidest reason. For being too ‘good’ and shit like that.

    As a young adult that doesn’t have much friends sucks. I’m currently on a break and I mix with people who are older than me. Therefore most of my friends are working, and honestly, friends of the same age are just too two faced to be mixed with!

    Just like you, I’m sad and really bitter about how hearty things never ever work out for me. I even have the thoughts of growing old alone and adopting kids and have pets. That’s how much I’ve lost hopes in hearty stuff because I’ve been let down too many times.

    I hate it when people tell me my time will come, the right person just haven’t found you, stop searching for love. scrap that. 9/10 of my friends are taken and has been going on strong. I can’t even stay in a relationSHIT for year. T____T

    Many times I told myself, I’d give up all my designer stuff to be happily in love. 🙁 But I guess things just doesn’t work that way. And I just want to be loved like how I love someone. No lies, no cheating and hurtful stuff like that. 🙁

  79. Caryssa says:

    Hi Tim,

    I was wondering abt the same thing too..about the perfect love of mine..if he even reli does exist..or is he stuck in north totally no luck in big time..was nurturing my broken heart now..cuz the guy i love, suddenly became a 360 degree changed person..just few days after he told me he loves me..guess he is a bit like u least thts what i thought at the beginning..but hell no..his gf sms me to stop calling her bf..i was like WTF..what i wana say is, when u love someone, dun be afraid to continue loving them..

    Hope good luck will come to every1 of us here soon..take care


  80. Caryssa says:


    U r not foreveralone..cuz i am alone too..hate the feeling of being alone during lunch, dinner..n Christmas n New year is coming..n it is sucks of being alone..when i thought i had met him, he suddenly walked out from my life..without saying a single word but just missing in action..until 1 day i got his sms..saying stop calling my bf..i was like WTF!!all the things he told me previously is just a piece of shit?when he said he love me, its not true also?making me worried like hell for whole week then make me almost heart attack with the stupid sms..i cried for few days..til i had no more tears left..til now, still wondering why he did that to what i wish for Christmas, is for all those alone girls / boys out thr, to find their true love..

    hugs babe..

  81. Viv says:

    I thought I am the only one who has to spend weekend alone always coz I am single, and my siblings r busy park-tohing on weekends.. But from what I see now, we r all on the same boat.. I also wish I can “give up” a bit of this n that in life, so as to have a loving rs without any hurts or lies.. But can we?! I met 2 jerks in my life that really broke my heart and made it hard for me to trust others easily.. I doesn’t have many friends who I can spend time with, coz I used to spend most of my time with him.. Now I regretted, but it is too late as most friends around my age are busy settling down, marriage, babies already.. No time to meet up you anymore.. I also imagine I may have to live alone till I am old and wrinkled, as I have no luck in love department too despite many telling me that I am very pretty (not trying to sell-praise here) and they find it’s impossible that I cannot find a guy I like?! Start asking me that if my standard is too high huh.. Haiz.. I know my parents and brothers are worried for me too, but I can possibly married any Tom Dick Harry who I don’t have any feelings about, right? Waking up to a person who u don’t have any feeling is a torture.. I rather stay single then. Anyway, my friends also comfort me with the exact same advice as yours, I can truthfully understand how u feel.. They are not us, so easy to say only while we r the one “suffering” and going through these shit alone.. No one can understand the pain and loneliness in our minds and hearts.. Take care Cheesie.. Love your this heartfelt blog entry which we all can related to. I wish u find your True Love soon aka in 2012, same goes for everyone of us here! *MUACKS*

  82. kc says:

    そんな事言わないでチージーきっといつか現れるよ!ぴったりの男が!ww でも一人でいることって付き合ってた人にフタマタかけられるよりずっといいじゃん?T_T (経験上の話・・)失望しないで!

  83. chu tan says:

    Dear Cheesie i believe the only reason nothing is happening in your love life is because you are sitting at home blogging while its fun to stay home and work you are unlikely to meet the love of your life there,,,there are exceptions like Xiaxue, but for the majority most people meet there mate at the work place, i personally didn’t have a boyfriend till i was 25 and i had to go through 4 of them to find the one i’m with right now who knows my worth, and i met them all at the place i was working at the time. Hope this helps go out there and find your other half or you can wait for him to come to you but who knows how long that would take…

  84. gna says:

    Always remember that you are not the only one facing the things as you have mentioned. All you need is patience. The right partner will appear soon enough. Moreover, only independent women can remain alone and still be doing perfectly fine. That’s exactly who you are 😉

    Just thought I should give my support since I have been reading your blog for ages and I’m leaving a comment on your blog for the first time.

  85. Kayyty says:

    Im #foreveralone too D: but im proud of it.

  86. YC LOCO says:

    I’m so like feeling the same way :/

  87. C says:

    I totally get you Cheesie. While in comparison to yours, my life is not half as glamourous, I do feel that the thing that is it missing is someone special to share it with. My last ex cheated on me with someone who worked in the same company as us. I checked his BB and found a gazillion texts to her with stuff like love you, miss you. I dumped the loser there and then.

    Indeed I do wonder did I do something wrong in a past life? LOL. Is this karma coming back to bite me in my ass, as I don’t think I did anything bad in this current life.

    My best friend also got married this year. And like you, I felt incredibly happy for her wholeheartedly, but I also asked deep down, what about me?

    Anyways, chin up gal! You’re NOT alone ya. As me and many others out there are in it with you together and really get where you are coming from. *BIG HUGS* Happy New Year in advance!

  88. Peter@somo says:

    liquidate your assets, move to maldives

    hit the beaches everyday drinking pina coloda
    and get swept off your feet by a blonde haired, blue eyes, hot bod, charming beach boy

  89. Anivyl says:

    cheesie, I know this is a damn old post (Wtf playing catch up) but I thought I should tell you my story here ok…

    I haven’t been alone since I was 18, which would have sounded impossible if you told me that at 17. My first bf raped me, my 2nd one said I was too fat for him, dumped me, then advised a good guy friend to ignore me until I only have girl friends nia.

    The third guy I was with, we dated for nearly 5 years. but I came here to study, he hacked my email because he was the jealous stupid sort, then proceeded to print out all my emails to a friend that detailed me saving a guy from suicide – as PROOF TO MY OTHER FRIENDS THAT I WAS CHEATING ON HIM. obviously we broke up but i wanted to remain friends. he came to australia to study and was in the same state as another friend. when I went to visit, he almost raped me, then told everyone (in tears, no less) that he was still in love with me.

    he is also the only ex bf/bf ever to want to marry me.

    The 4th guy borrowed nearly 8k from me and didn’t give it back.

    The next guy, I was an idiot and dumped him.

    My last partner also borrowed money from me but tell everyone i drained him of his money, got his mum to scold me, on top of calling me a bitch and a gold digger.

    I should really probably give up, but dear god in heaven, i still want to believe life can be good!

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