Junya turns 2 years 11 months today, and Sakura is… 1!!

I still remember the days when I was so so so nervous to find out the gender of my second baby… If it turned out to be a boy again I will make myself a third one lol.

And now my baby girl is 1 year old. Which makes her not a baby anymore T__T. And in one month’s time, my toddler boy is also not a toddler anymore. Omg it’s a little too much to take in at one go. Haha.

I have celebrated a first year birthday, twice!!! Now that’s an achievement for myself haha.

Just for comparison ^^

Let’s look at Oniichan first.

For Junya

Also read Junya’s  1st month , 2nd month , 3rd month , 4th month , 5th month , 6th month , 7th month 8th month, 9th month , 10th month , 11th month , 12th month , 13th month , 14th month 15th month , 16th month , 17th month , 18th months , 19th month , 20th month ,21st month , 22nd month , 23rd month 24th month , 25th month , 26th month , 27th month , 28th month , 29th month , 30th month , 31st month , 32nd month , 33rd month and 34th month here.


Money in the air

Junya is starting to take his imaginary belongings/creations a little too seriously.

Every night after Sakura sleeps, it is “JunJun Special Time”, and he loves to play pretend with me. One day he stuffed a soft toy into a box and presented it to me.

Junya: hai mama, I make cake.
Mama: Wow thank you so much! Nom nom nom nom *eats cake*
Junya: No mama, you blow the candle first.
Mama: Ok ok. *blows*
Junya: Hai. Can you give me fork?
Mama: *grabs imaginary fork and passes to son*
Junya: No no! The big one, not the small one!
Mama: *grabs a imaginarily smaller imaginary fork and passes to son*
Junya: Hai. Can you pay money?
Mama: (Why I must pay for my own birthday cake -_-) Ok. How much is it?
Junya: Twenty dollars.
Mama: *grabs imaginary money and hands over*
Junya: No, from your pocket.
Mama: (sigh) *Stretches hand into imaginary pocket to pull out imaginary money*

Another day, he made me some food (imaginary) and asked for money. And then he also gave me an imaginary receipt. I ate the receipt too, just for the fun of it, and he got genuinely upset. “Mama!! Where my receipt??!” and then I had to regurgitate the imaginarily half-masticated receipt back for him 🙄.

Manner Police

He is now very actively playing the manner police to catch his sister in misbehaviour, so that I could correct the baby who has no idea what she was doing.

“MAMA! Sakuwa throw the remote control!”
“MAMA! Sakuwa drop the spoon!”
“MAMA! Sakuwa say nononono!”

Yeap. His sister’s favorite gesture now is shaking her head. She shakes her head whenever she hears someone say “no” or “dowan”. And the brother’s favorite word is still “dowan.”

Junya: *sulking* Dowan mama, dowan to eat peanut butter toast.
Sakura: *shakes head*
Junya: *upset* MAMA! See Sakuwa liddis!!! *shakes his own head to show me what his sister did*
Sakura: *very pleased that she gets a response so she shakes her head more vigorously*
Junya: *super upset* MAMA!!! Dowan Sakuwa! Sakura liddis!!!! *shakes head*
Sakura: *shakes head non-stop*


Again he was genuinely annoyed because he thought his sister is mocking him sarcastically of his “dowan dowan” when the baby was just doing it in respond to the words she knows, and happily so since every time she gets an exaggerated reaction from her brother.



Yeap. The big Y nightmare has begun. Every waking hour I have to tune my brain to work separately, focusing on whatever I do and have a spare CPU running at the same time to answer his endless questions.

(At the supermarket.)

Mama: Let’s go home!
Junya: Why we go home?
Mama: Because we finished shopping.
Junya: why we finish shopping?
Mama: Because… We have bought everything we need.
Junya: Why we bought everything we need?
Mama: Because…hmm. Because… Junya wanted to eat peanut butter toast so I bought bread and peanut butter.
Junya: Why Junya want to eat peanut butter toast?
Mama: … You wanted to eat peanut butter toast, right?
Junya: Oh.

(In the bathroom)

Mama: I have to shower Sakura first ok.
Junya: Why shower Sakuwa?
Mama: Because she is sweaty.
Junya: Why she is sweaty?
Mama: Because… our bodies sweat when it is hot.
Junya: Why our body sweat when it hot?
Mama: Because…we have tiny pores all over our body.
Junya: Why we have tiny pore our body?
Mama: Everybody has pores.
Junya: Why everybody heh pore?
Mama: … That’s the way it is.
Junya: Why that the way it is?


A long walk home

One of the things that I dread everyday is the walk home after picking him up from school. (Papa does the drop off in the morning so I’m very thankful for that.)

The walk from our apartment to his school is about 15 minutes. Which is fine for me. I mean, I have zero time for any fitness activity, so I am happy to anyhow count this as one. HOWEVER, the walk from the school back to our house is somehow… I dunno. 30 minutes. Or more. Depending on how many things catch his attention that particular day. Usually A LOT.

Yeap. He wants to stop and tell me about every. single. image that his retina receives. Sometimes under scorching sun, with me pushing a stroller stuffed with frozen gyoza and a baby who is tired and fussing, all I wish is to GET BACK HOME TO AIRCON AT FULL BLAST AND SHOVE THE MELTING GYOZA INTO THE FREEZER. But no. My overly observant and inquisitive toddler does not know any of that.

“Mama, why got hole here on the road. Why?”

So we spend about 3 minutes here examining the hole. And then 2 minutes later…

“Mama? What is this number?”

(He means alphabets. He is learning letters in school and now he stops at every damn poster ad, signboard, road sign, and ask me what does it say.) (Imagine he asks me to read out the phone number of EVERY SINGLE to-let ad hanging outside apartments?! ARGGGH.)

Sometimes I purposely distract him (Junya let’s sing a song!! Junya you want to eat hamburg or chicken later??) whenever I see something that may intrigue him that will end up stalling the walk home. But hey, he always manages to find something else to be amazed about. Roadworks, buses, grass… I used to walk damn fast and pretend I didn’t hear lol. But boy, he would stop and call out, MAMA, MAMA!!! until I walked back to him and entertained his questions/statements. Double the work for me 😒. So now I have learnt to just be his Miss Google on demand whenever, whenever. Faster that way anyway. 😒 ASK AWAY!!


Cover mouth

If he does something bad (like breaking something in the house) he covers his mouth and looks genuinely shocked.

If I talk to guests and he really REALLY wants my attention, he covers my mouth. -__-


JunJun says

(on the way to school)

Mama: Can you hold your own backpack? I have many heavy things to carry.
Junya: No cuz we almost reaching (school).
Mama: -_-


Junya: Mama! Junya is number 1 or number 2?
Mama: Hmmm. What do you think?
Junya: Number 1 and number 2.


Junya: Mama? Why Junya say dowan papa? Why I do that?


For Sakura

Is now one year old!! 😀

Read Sakura’s 1st month, 2nd month , 3rd month , 4th month , 5th month 6th month , 7th month , 8th month 9th month , 10th month and 11th month here.



Compared to her elder brother, Sakura prefers to take things slow. Junya started walking 4 days after his birthday, Sakura doesn’t really like cruising (along tables/couches, etc) and will only walk when I hold her hands. And she loves it!

She can now pick up things and pass it to me/brother when we ask her to. And also busy stuffing things into pouches/bottles/boxes. ^^ She can clap, and her favorite activity is of course… throwing everything we give to her -_-.

She can also (try to) mimic some words although totally not accurate at all lol.

Mama: “BA-NA-NA!”
Sakura: “appa.

Oh she can also do “kiss”, which means opening her mouth and rub it against my cheek lol.



I no longer have to carry her like a backpack while doing housework anymore. One day she just roamed into a spare room (which was supposed to be her and Junya’s bedroom until the plan failed -_-) and played lego by herself.

And the best thing that happened was, she is finally willing to sit in the stroller. We have a total of 3 strollers at home yet we only use one, and that’s to put my bags and shopping, or Junya when he needs a rest or nap after a long outing. Sakura never liked to be in the stroller. Put her down for 5 seconds and she started crying to be carried. T_T. So I ended up baby-carrying her all.the.time for the past 11 months.

One day she just decided that ok fine, I’ll sit in the stroller. after months of trying and coaxing. The first few days I distracted her with snacks and a bottle of water (toys never work cuz she will just throw them off the stroller -_-). When she starts fussing I just pass a stick snack which she can slowly nibble on.

I am hoping that this is the start of an end to my agonizing back pain.



When Junya was 1 I remember being super paranoid about his weight because he was soooooo lighttttt (still is). And now Sakura is even lighter than Junya at 1 year old. She is barely 7KG. After pooping is like 6.9 or something. 3 months old babies are heavier than her. She is eating and nursing well otherwise. I already gave up on having babies of average weight. -_-


6 teeth

She now has 6 teeth! Two new upper teeth on their way out! The teeth-grinding is still happening occasionally 😒.


Weaning & Sleep Training

She woke up every 15 minutes during the first hour of her night sleep, and out of convenience I always nursed her back to sleep. I know, I know. It was the easiest way for us until I realized that it was also the hardest way. Just like how giving a pacifier was the easy way out at first. I wasn’t very concerned about it because Junya was exactly like that, and he grew to be a super good sleeper over time. Even Aerosmith screaming on steroid won’t wake him up nowadays.

But I thought it was time all of us deserve a better, uninterrupted sleep. Junya had a successfully “cry it out” sleep training for only 3 days (and the rest was bliss), so I applied the same method for Sakura, for the goal of weaning her night feeds. The first night I basically held and rocked a screaming wild baby bear for like 2-3 hours in total, throughout the night. And then the second night about 5 minutes. Then the third night, she woke up a couple of times but she just whined for a few seconds and drifted back to sleep.


Just when I thought I’m done with this whole waking up to settle babies thing for the rest of my life, a fever hit right in my face. Well, actually on Sakura, and all my effort is now down the drain.



Why do babies always get their first major fever around 1 year old?? Junya also got his exactly at 12 months old.

Just when Sakura was weaned off the night, the fever made her fussy the whole night, so I ended up giving in and nursed her all night long in bed hoping that she would feel better.

Now I have to do it all over again. T__T.


For Mama

Breastfeeding Journey

Junya was breastfed for 15 months. When I found out I was pregnant with Sakura I thought it was time to stop. I did pump (hate hate hate) a lot, and as soon as he turned 6 months old I supplemented with formula to buy myself some freedom. My mom or the ex helper could help look after him when I was away for work.

For Sakura, things are different. This time around I don’t have a helper, and my mom isn’t in the same country. Sakura also did not know how to use a milk bottle. Every time I shove it to her she just ended up chewing it like a teether and then spitting it out with a disgusted expression.

So the result was, I have breastfed her for one whole year. Full time. Without supplementing. Or Pumping. Which also means, I have not stepped away from her for more than 30 minutes at a time for 365 days. In fact the only time I left her was to quickly run over to Ichiran 10 mins away from our Roppongi apartment to fix my ramen craving in the middle of the night during our trip in Tokyo, and then crept back into bed. That’s how much we have been stuck together, and how inseparable we have become.

She is 1 now. I am slowly introducing formula, in bottles, in straw cups, in normal cups, in bottle without the teat. Sometimes she takes it, sometimes she spits out. Sometimes she just pushes away and grab my shirt and rubs her face into my chest and complains instead.

As cliched as it sounds, it is a truly special relationship. While I am dying to wean her off the night, I also get this crazy urge to want to nurse her at the same time. Like, when she is deep asleep I would sometimes wish that I could just cuddle her and shove my boob to her little mouth. Lolol did you hear how insane I just sounded??? I don’t know, it just feels soooo comforting, for the both of us, and a perfect way to fall asleep, for the both of us. Anyway so I am absolutely sending mix signals to both her and myself – Aiya nemai la just feed her one extra time won’t hurt. Huh no! It’s time to stop!! But…

Then I remember how I felt like I had a bad breakup after weaning Junya completely, so I have decided that it is not time yet. I’m not ready. I don’t want to break up just yet.


#pokeMOM Level 29

The danna had to go back to Japan for work and I was left with two kids to handle for one whole week.

I remember when I was 8 months pregnant with Sakura, I had to take care of Junya alone too when he was back to Japan, and that was right after my ex helper ran away. It was my worst nightmare ever because it turned out Junya had high fever and was vomitting the whole night.

I remember waking up every 15 minutes to soothe him, and I had to change the bedsheet in the middle of the night like 3 times because he kept throwing up UNTIL I HAD NO MORE SPARE SHEETS TO CHANGE. In the end I gave up and just line bath towels over his bed and just remove the towels. It was really one of the worst nights ever. And to think that I have to deal with a mountain of puke-filled sheets and towels the next morning 😭😭😭.

This time around, I thought it was  gonna be a breeze. I mean, I have done it so many times and I should be a pro by now, plus Junya goes to school, hah. Nothing I cannot handle.

… or so I thought.

And then Sakura developed high fever.

Why. JUST WHY?? Why does every time I am left with two kids all by myself, I have to be tested with a new mission impossible?

Oh, and just when I thought things couldn’t have gotten worse, they bloody did.

I started to have a fever myself LOLOLOL. At this point I was just like, ok whatever dude. Is that all you have? COME AT ME!!! ALL AT ONCE! MUWAHHAHA…

Anyway, Junya did not fall sick, so it was not the worst. Yet.

And then I had to deal with this lolol. This is nothing.

And I survived this challenge. I feel invincible now. I really do.

You would think that I would be relieved to have the danna back and just chill the hell out of the last day before his flight home right? No. I went on a major house cleaning session. Kitchen, toilet, every single dirty laundry. I think I am slowly mutating with Japanese wife DNA. And I actually really did enjoy the cleaning process. There’s nothing worse than coming back to a home that looks like a tornado aftermath. That’s basic courtesy you have to master in order to stay married with a Japanese husband lol.

And? He bought us all 7-11 egg sandwiches and mentaiko onigiri and special edition pocky that day. All worth it.


My Baby Girl

Remember I said somewhere in this blog before, that I could not imagine how having a baby girl would be like, because having a boy just felt so right. Uh… right. I take that back now. If (IF!!!) I ever have a third child, there’s no doubt I would want another girl. (For now. Who knows I’ll change my mind again lol).

Because… girls are SO. CUTE. Omg. Junya is cute but… Sakura is another level of cute. Of course Junya is bigger now and I can’t be sniffing and smooching him all the time. But that’s exactly why my lips are constantly stuck to Sakura’s cheek. Like, every waking hour lolol. ARGHHH I want to glue my lips to her cheeks lolol. I am also obsessed with kissing the curved corner of her lips because then I get the lips AND cheek at the same time, which is better than 7-11 egg sandwiches and mentaiko onigiri combined.

Come to think of it now, it probably doesn’t have anything to do with gender after all. I just want to kiss and sniff and cuddle a baby. Because… they grow up too fast. I know because I experienced it first hand. Now at the second attempt, I am trying to cling on to the whole babyhood as tightly and obsessively as I could.

And I am going to say the weirdest thing every single mother will say at some point, which turns out to be the most heartfelt words that we don’t really mean at all, in all contradiction:

“Please don’t grow up so fast.”

(No, really, please do, but please don’t.)


My Big Boy

As I am typing this, Junya is asleep on the couch behind me. He fell asleep while waiting for me to clean up the house. The only precious time Junya has with me is after Sakura goes to bed. Now I understand why he always end up sleeping so late. Because he was looking forward to “Junjun Special Time”. I read him books, we talked nonsense, and then I had to prepare for tomorrow morning’s routine. He waited for me and fell asleep. So I thought why not I continue to write this blog post, and here I am.

Many nights I carry him to bed from the living room, and it feels a little strange. Now it hit me that it was because I am not used to carrying him anymore. He has grown so much that his body shape and weight is totally different from Sakura. Then it shocked me how long I have not cuddled or carried him.

Then I think about many of the 2~3 year old boys I know. Usually they still ask to be carried and manja their mothers. But I don’t even remember the last time Junya asked to be carried. Recently he doesn’t even ask to sit in the stroller anymore.

My brave boy. Grasping the concept of being an older brother. Taking in new unknown emotions. Getting used to sharing his mama’s love with another person. Wading through rejection every time a request is denied. Learning how to be strong.

My brave, brave boy. Whenever you need a hug, I am here. Always.